Dance Jokes / Recent Jokes

roses r red violets r blu god made me hot what happend 2 u God made rivers god made lakes ur so fat what u do sit home and eat cup cakes So what i got a hole in my pants this is my life dance bitch dance

The soldiers are tired and lonely after spending weeks in enemy territory. To entertain them, the Major called for this sexy dancer from the nearby town.

She came, danced and when the first dance was done, the soldiers went mad. They clapped for 5 minutes.

For her second number, she stripped and danced in sheer bra and G string. This time the applause went for 10 minutes.

The next number she danced topless, and this time the applause went on and on. The Major had to come on stage and ask them to quiet down for the grand finale.

For her last number, she was to strip completely and dance naked. The Major expected the soldiers to make enough noise to bring the roof down. But ten minutes later, there is no clapping and the dancer comes backstage.

The Major asks her, "What happened? How come there was no clapping this time?"

She replied with a wicked smile, "Major, how do you expect those poor boys to clap more...

Andy: "Doc, I had the worst dream of my life last night. I dreamed I was with twelve of the most beautiful chorus girls in the world. Blondes, brunettes, redheads, all dancing in a row." Doctor: "Hold it, Andy. That doesnt sound so terrible." Andy: Oh yeah? In the dream, I was the third girl from the end."

1.) Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2.) If you have to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings". 3.) There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness". 4.) People who want to share their religious veiws with you almost never want you to share yours with them. 5.) And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle. 6.) You should not confuse your career with your life. 7.) No matter what happens... somebody will find a way to take it too seriously. 8.) When trouble arises & things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution & is willing to take command. Very often, that person is crazy. 9.) Nobody cares if you can't dance well. more...

Q. Whats the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.

1.) Man: "Haven't we met before?" Woman: "Yes, I was the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."2.) Man: "So, wanna go back to my place? " Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"3.) Man: "I'd really like to get into your pants." Woman: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there."4.) The most memorable rebuttal to a turn-down (used by the guy whoused to live across the hall from me in residence) when he asked a girl to dance and she refused:Man: "Want to Dance?"Woman: "No, thank you."Man: "Don't thank me, thank God because somebody asked you."5.) Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"Woman: "It's in the phone book."Man: "But I don't know your name."Woman: "That's in the phone book too."6.) Man: "So what do you do for a living?" Woman: "Female impersonator."7.) Man: "You know, I'd really love to travel more...

1.) Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2.) If you have to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings".
3.) There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".
4.) People who want to share their religious veiws with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
5.) And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.
6.) You should not confuse your career with your life.
7.) No matter what happens... somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
8.) When trouble arises & things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution & is willing to take command. Very often, that person is crazy.
9.) Nobody more...