Detectives Jokes

Why did the San Francisco Police Department fire all their gay detectives?
They kept blowing all their cases

Las Vegas -

An accused car thief might have earned an "A" for effort, but he was arrested anyway. Recently, detectives from the repeat offender unit spotted a suspected car thief - identified as Juliano Rosado, 29 - in a new car with a temporary license tag.

A quick call to the dealer revealed the car had been stolen. When the man parked the car, detectives obtained a duplicate key and took the car back. When the man came out of his home, he looked in vain but couldn't find the stolen car.

Police say he then went to another car dealership and stole a pickup truck. The results were the same: Detectives watched him drive off in the truck, then used a spare key to recover the vehicle after the suspect parked and entered a pawnshop. "When he came out he started looking up the street, waiting to see the truck, you could see his shoulders slump when he saw it wasn't there," police said.

Undaunted, he took a public bus to a more...

A policeman interrogates three blondes who are training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first blonde a picture for five seconds and then hides it. “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him? ”
The first blonde answers, “That’s easy, we’ll catch him fast because he only has one eye! ”
The policeman says, “Well, uh, thats because the picture shows his profile. ”
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for five seconds at the second blonde and asks her, “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him? ”
The second blonde giggles, flips her hair and says, “Ha! He’d be too easy to catch because he only has one ear! ”
The policeman angrily responds, “What’s the matter with you two?! Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it’s a picture of his profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with? ”
Extremely frustrated at more...

A policeman was testing 3 Singh brothers who were training to become
detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the
first Singh a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your
suspect, how would you recognize him?" The first Singh answers, "That's
easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!" The policeman
says, "Well... uh... that's because the picture I showed is his side
profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for
5 seconds at the second Singh and asks him, "This is your suspect, how
would
you recognize him?"
The second Singh smiles and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy
to catch because he only has one ear!" The policeman angrily responds,
"What's the matter with you two? Of course only one eye and one ear are
showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best more...

These three blondes were taking a test to see if they were qualified to be detectives. The lead detective went to the first blonde and showed her a picture and said how would you identify this man to the police? She goes oh thats easy he's only got one eye. The detective looks at her and says that it's a side profile and then went on to the next blonde. Asked her the same question, she goes oh thats easy he's only got one ear! The detective now getting irritated goes on to the third blonde. Asks her the same question, she thinks a while then says oh thats easy he wears contacts. The detective looks suprised checks his records and comes back and says your right how did you know that. The blonde looks and him and says well he cant wear glasses because he's only got one eye and one ear!