Doo Jokes / Recent Jokes
A Little Johnny went to sit on Santa's lap, and Santa asked him what he wanted for Christmas.
Little Johnny answered, "A damn swing set in the backyard."
"Excuse me?" said Santa.
"I want a damn swing set in my backyard," repeated Little Johnny.
Santa said, "You'll have to ask nicer if you want Santa to bring you something. Let's try again. What else do you want?"
Little Johnny answered, "A damn sandbox for the side yard."
"You have to ask politely! One more time. What else do you want for Christmas?"
Little Johnny thought for a minute, then said, "I want a damn trampoline in the front yard."
Santa sighed and set Little Johnny off his lap. "I'm sorry son, I can't give anything to someone who talks like you do. I'm not bringing you anything for Christmas."
Santa then called Johnny's parents over and told them what had happened. They apologized profusely, saying more...
You might be a child of the 80's if...... you have deep, personal relationships via computer with people you've never met in real life.... the phrase "going courting", to you, means fighting an unjust traffic ticket or playing tennis.... you know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song.... not that you'd do it personally, but body piercing captivates your attention.... you remember the days when cocaine was just fine in powder form, thankyouverymuch.... you think the "the Gay 90's" refers to this decade and sexual orientation.... the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories.... you remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it was called "Battlestar Galactica".... songs by Debbie Gibson still haunt you to this day.... three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?... you remember the days that hooking your computer into your television wasn't an expensive more...
A Little Johnny went to sit on Santa's lap, and Santa asked him what he wanted
for Christmas.
Little Johnny answered, "A damn swingset in the backyard."
"Excuse me?" said Santa.
"I want a damn swingset in my backyard," repeated Little Johnny.
Santa said, "You'll have to ask nicer if you want Santa to bring you something.
Let's try again. What else do you want?"
Little Johnny answered, "A damn sandbox for the side yard."
"You have to ask politely! One more time. What else do you want for Christmas?"
Little Johnny thought for a minute, then said, "I want a damn trampoline in
the front yard."
Santa sighed and set Little Johnny off his lap. "I'm sorry son, I can't give
anything to someone who talks like you do. I'm not bringing you anything for
Christmas."
Santa then called Johnny's more...
WARNING: May be offensive to animal lovers, flood victims, Timothy McVeigh, Dan Quayle, Clarence Thomas, AOL, Lousianians, British Royalty, Los Angelenos, the IRS, smokers, President Clinton, Mafiosi, airline luggage handlers AND airline food preparers Includes reference to drug use, sex, God and doo doo heads...
Well folks, it's springtime, when a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of love, while his remote turns to the NCAA tournament.
After President Clinton injured his knee, his press secretary was asked if he had been given painkillers. The answer,' Yes, but he didn't swallow them.'
Al Gore is taking heat for his role in campaign fundraising. In true vice presidential form, he issued a statement saying,' This is becoming a real hot potatoe.'
The IRS wants to improve its image. They will no longer answer the phone with' Next victim', and their new mascot' Timmy the Tax Collector' will replace the Grim Reaper. (Daily Scoop)
Liggett Group Inc. is going to more...