Doug Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.

His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?"

"I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob.

"Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade."

Tammy bought a new book recently entitled "What Twenty Million American Women Want."
Seeing the title, Doug grabbed the book out of her hand and started thumbing through the pages.
Astonished and not just a little bit irritated, Tammy stared up at him and said, "What in the world are you doing?"
Doug replies, "I just want to see if they've got my name spelled right."

IF DR SEUSS WROTE AN EPISODE OF ER - -Kerry: Now Mark, I think this ER's great, But.. . there are problems that can't wait! Now Benton's fine, and Carter too, But Ross and Susan just won't do! Now who do you think that we should hire, Since both of them today I'll fire? Mark: Kerry, maybe we should wait and see.. . Kerry: That's great Mark! I knew you would agree.. . Jerry: Dr. Weaver? Sorry to interrupt.. . But the paramedics just pulled up. Mark: Ok, I'm here. What have you got? Shep: This little boy has just been shot! His pulse is faint, his breath is weak. We did all we could to stop the leak. Riley: And this woman here, she has a broken hip.. . Carol: How did she fall? How did she trip? Shep: The kid's mom was getting in my hair, So I shoved her--lightly--down some stairs. Mark: Benton, Kerry! Take the mom to three! Doug and Susan! Come with me! Riley: But wait, but wait! Oh don't you see? We've got some more; one, two, and three. Kerry: You've got three more? How can this be? more...

Bob and Doug weren't only best buddies, they were the biggest of baseball fans. They spent much of their time discussing baseball history, checking all the scores and went to as many games as possible every season. They promised each other that whoever died first would come back and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven.
One night Bob passed away in his sleep. A few nights later, his pal Doug woke up to the sound of Bob's voice from beyond.
"Is that you Bob?" Doug asked. "Of course it's me," replied Bob.
"I can't believe it!" exclaimed Doug. "Quick, tell me, is there baseball in heaven?"
"Doug, I have some good and some bad news for you. Which would you like first?" Bob said.
"Tell me the good news first," Doug replied.
"Well Doug, the good news is, you bet there's baseball in heaven," said Bob. "The bad news is, you're pitching tomorrow night."