Drawing Jokes / Recent Jokes
A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols, in this order of appearance: A woman, a donkey, a shovel, a fish, and a Star of David.
They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least three thousand years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists from all over the world came to study the ancient symbols.
They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss what they could agree was the meaning of the markings. The President of their society stood up and pointed at the first drawing and said: "This looks like a woman. We can judge that this race was family- oriented and held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol resembles a donkey, so, they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil.
The next drawing looks like a more...
All the boys and girls in Mrs. Dovers class are drawing. Mrs. Dover came over to Tommy and said, "What picture are you drawing?"
Tommy said, "A cow eating grass."
"Ok, where's the grass?"
"The cow ate it all."
"Ok, where's the cow?"
"It went to go look for more grass."
What is the value of a kind word?
In January of 1986 I was flipping through the channels on TV and saw the closing credits for a PBS show called "Funny Business," a show about cartooning. I had always wanted to be a cartoonist but never knew how to go about it. I wrote to the host of the show, cartoonist Jack Cassady, and asked his advice on entering the profession.
A few weeks later I got an encouraging handwritten letter from Jack, answering all of my specific questions about materials and process. He
went on to warn me about the likelihood of being rejected at first, advising me not to get discouraged if that happened. He said the cartoon samples I sent him were good and worthy of publication.
I got very excited, finally understanding how the whole process worked. I submitted my best cartoons to Playboy and New Yorker. The magazines quickly rejected me with cold little photocopied form letter. Discouraged, I put my art supplies in the closet and more...
A man visits a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, I think I have an obsession with sex. Can you help me?"
The doctor agrees to examine him and begins by showing him various drawings. First, the doctor draws a square and asks the man to identify it.
"OH MY! Four people having sex!" exclaims the man.
Next, the doctor draws a circle. The man gasps and says, "One man having sex."
The doctor then draws a triangle. The man looks at the drawing and says, "Two women and one man having sex."
The doctor puts the drawings away and says, "I agree. You do seem to have an obsession with sex."
"ME??? YOU'RE the one who's drawing all the dirty pictures!" the man replies.
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. As she got to one little girl who was working very diligently, she asked what the little girl was drawing. The little girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused awkwardly and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat or looking up from her drawing, the little girl replied, "They will in a minute."