Dream Jokes / Recent Jokes

Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, "Bill, I had awonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautifulcountry, and on each house I saw a banner.""What did it say on the banners?" Clinton asks.Saddam replies, "Allah is god, god is Allah."Clinton says, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner.""What could you see on the banners?" Saddam asks.Clinton replies, "I don't know. I can't read Hebrew."

One day I was telling my close friend about my dream the previous
night I had dreamt that I was at a fantastic circus and loved
every minute of it.
He said, "That's interesting; I also had a beautiful dream- in
my dream there was a knock on the door while I was watching TV
alone at night. And there was Raquel Welch asking whether she
could come in! (readers should know my age by now and that this
is a joke from some 30 years ago!!!!). I was
simply delighted and asked her in and almost fainted when I saw
Sophia Loren coming in behind her. I did not know what to do,
me with these two lovely ladies...."
I was becoming impatient by now. I said to my friend, "Come on
machan, we have been such close friends for so long. All you had
to do was to ring me and I would have been there in a jiffy!"
To which my friend replied, "I did ring you my dear chap. But
your mother told me you had gone to a more...

Three guys drive to a ski range and arrive late at night. They finally
find a place to stay, but when they get to their room, they find that it
only has one large bed, and this is the last room in the place. They
decide, 'what the heck, it's only one night' and share the bed.
The next morning they all wake up. The guy on the left side of the bed
says, "I had the strangest dream. I thought some guy was jerking me off."
The guy on the other side of bed is shocked. "I had the same dream, too!"
The guy who slept in the middle says, "Well, I didn't have that dream. I
thought I was skiing!"

"Doc," said the young man lying down on the couch, "You've got to help me! Every night I have the same horrible dream. I'm lying in bed when all of a sudden five drop dead gorgeous women rush in and start tearing off my clothes."

The psychiatrist nodded, "And what do you do?"

"I push them away!"

"I see. And what can I do to help you with this?"

The patient implored, "Please, Break my arms!"

pledge of punjabi boys:-
punjab is our nation
girls r in our meditation
dating is our occupation
drinking is our profession
every day is celebration
to hell with education
because CANADA is our dream destination...

Banta: "Yaar Santa, last night I had a wonderful dream, I saw I was getting married."
Santa: "Last night I also had a wonderful dream. I saw I was getting divorced."

Wife: "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars."
Husband: "How about the ones like mine?"
Wife: "Those they gave away."
Husband: "I had a dream too... I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand."
Wife: "And how much for the ones like mine?"
Husband: "That's where they held the auction."