Dressing Jokes / Recent Jokes
...former porn queen jenna jameson is putting out her own brands of salad dressing...the first flavor will be Mustang Ranch.
As a hooker was dressing, she turned to her customer and asked, "Have you just gotten out of prison?" "Yeah," the guy replied. "How did you guess? Is it because I wanted to have sex from the rear?" "Partly." She said. "But more because when we finished, you ran around in front of me, bent over, and shouted,' YOUR TURN.'"
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to bathroom. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat. 4. Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 6. Wash your hair again with cucumber and aloe vera shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 7. Condition your hair with cucumber and aloe vera conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red raw. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least 15 minutes more...
As a hooker was dressing, she turned to her customer and asked, "Have you justgotten out of prison?""Yeah," the guy replied. "How did you guess? Is it because I wanted to have sexfrom the rear?""Partly." She said. "But more because when we finished, you ran around in frontof me, bent over, and shouted, YOUR TURN."
Q: Why Did The Santa Feel Shy On Opening The Refridgerator? A: Because He Saw The' Salad Dressing'.
Women will spend hours dressing up to go out, and then they'll go out and spend more time checking out other women. Men can never catch women checking out other men; women will always catch men checking out
Seeing how the All Blacks were motivated by performing The Haka before their world cup games, the other nations were asked to suggest pre-match rituals of their own....
The England team will chat about the weather, wave hankies in the air and attach bells to their ankles for a while before moaning about how they invented the game, and gave it to the world, and how it's not fair that everyone can beat them now.
The Scotland team will realise they only have fourteen players and recruit a Jamaican living in East Anglia who has never been north of Doncaster.
The Ireland team will spilt into two, with the Southern half performing a Riverdance, while the Northerners march the Traditional route from their dressing room to the pitch, via their opponents dressing room.
Unfortunately the Welsh suggestion has been vetoed by the RSPCA.
Argentina will unexpectedly invade a small part of opposition territory, claim it as their own Las more...