East Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: There is a frog driving east and a trombonist walking west. What can be surmised from this? A: The frogs probably on its way to a gig.

Everything east of the San Andreas fault will eventually plunge into the Atlantic Ocean.

On Sunday, a nor’easter pounded the east coast and cause of the inclement weather conditions over 400 flights were grounded.

As a result JetBlue flights were canceled as scheduled.

Two men are sitting next to each other in an Irish-style pub in New York City. They both order pints of Guinness. One of them turns to the other and says "So where are you from, then?" "I'm from Ireland." "Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more. "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin." "Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more. "Where in Dublin are you from?" "The East Side." "The East Side? Me too! What a coincidence! I'll drink to that!" They both finish their pints and order two more. "Where on the East Side are you from?" "McDonagh Street." "Me too! This is incredible! I'll drink to that." As the bartender pours them another two pints, another customer at the bar says to him, "That's amazing! I can't believe they're from the same street in Dublin. What's going on?" "Oh, more...

Two men are sitting next to each other in an Irish-style pub in New York City. They both order pints of Guinness. One of them turns to the other and says "So where are you from, then?"
"I'm from Ireland."
"Me too! I'll drink to that."
They both finish their pints and order two more.
"Where in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin."
"Me too! I'll drink to that."
They both finish their pints and order two more.
"Where in Dublin are you from?"
"The East Side."
"The East Side? Me too! What a coincidence! I'll drink to that!" They both finish their pints and order two more.
"Where on the East Side are you from?"
"McDonagh Street."
"Me too! This is incredible! I'll drink to that."
As the bartender pours them another two pints, another customer at the bar says to him, "That's amazing! I can't believe they're from the more...

1. The most valuable function performed by the federal government is entertainment.
2. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
3. A penny saved is worthless.
4. They can hold all the peace talks they want, but there will never be peace in the Middle East. Billions of years from now, when Earth is hurtling toward the Sun and there is nothing left alive on the planet except a few microorganisms, the microorganisms living in the Middle East will be bitter enemies.
5. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.
6. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is: age 11.
7. There is a very fine line between “hobby” more...

This is the latest joke doing the rounds in Frankfurt, since East and West Germany were united. A Frenchman, a Scotsman, a West German and an East German met in a restaurant to celebrate. The Frenchman ordered a bottle of champagne and poured it out to his friends. The bottle was only half-empty when he tossed it out of the window. "Why did you do that?" asked the others. "Not to worry," replied the Frenchman "we have plenty of champagne in France and can afford to waste some."
The Scotsman ordered a bottle of premium brand Scotch and filled four glasses. Following the Frenchman's example, he tossed the bottle, still half-full, out of the window. "Why did you do that?" asked his companions. "Not to worry," replied the Scotsman, "there is plenty of Scotch available in my country. Wasting some doesn't make much difference."
It was the turn of the West German. He didn't know what to offer his friends. So he picked up more...