Eject Jokes / Recent Jokes
Customer: "I got this problem. You people sent me this install disk, and now my A: drive won't work."Tech Support: "Your A drive won't work?"Customer: "That's what I said. You sent me a bad disk, it got stuck in my drive, now it won't work at all."Tech Support: "Did it not install properly? What kind of error messages did you get?"Customer: "I didn't get any error message. The disk got stuck in the drive and wouldn't come out. So I got these pliers and tried to get it out. That didn't work either."Tech Support: "You did what, sir?"Customer: "I got these pliers, and tried to get the disk out, but it wouldn't budge. I just ended up cracking the plastic stuff a bit."Tech Support: "I don't understand sir, did you push the eject button?"Customer: "No, so then I got a stick of butter and melted it and used a turkey baster and put the butter in the drive, around the disk, and that got it loose. Then I used more...
Top Things You Don't Want to Overhear Over an Airline P.A. System1. Ocean crossing flight: This is your Captain speaking, I just wanted to take this time to remind you that your seat cushions can be used as floatation devices.2. Hey folks, we're going to play a little game of geography trivia. If you can recognize where we are, tell your flight attendant and receive an extra pack of peanuts.3. Our loss of altitude allows a unique close up perspective of the local terrain. I assure you that it's all part of our airline's new commitment to make your a flight a sight seeing extravaganza. 4. Goose! Bogey at 2 o'clock....one on our tail!!!! Eject!!!! Eject!!!!!!!5. Ummmmmm....Sorry......(silence) 6. (As the plane turns around right after takeoff)....uhhhhh....we have to go back. ...we. .we. ...uhhhhhh. ...forgot something..... 7. I'm sure everyone noticed the loss of an engine, however the reduction in weight and drag will mean we'll be flying much more efficiently now.8. Fasten your seat more...
1. Ocean crossing flight: This is your Captain speaking, I just wanted to take this time to remind you that your seat cushions can be used as floatation devices.
2. Hey folks, we’re going to play a little game of geography trivia. If you can recognize where we are, tell your flight attendant and receive an extra pack of peanuts.
3. Our loss of altitude allows a unique close up perspective of the local terrain. I assure you that it’s all part of our airline’s new commitment to make your a flight a sight seeing extravaganza.
4. Goose! Bogey at 2 o’clock…. one on our tail!!!! Eject!!!! Eject!!!!!!!
5. Ummmmmm…. Sorry……(silence)
6. (As the plane turns around right after takeoff)…. uhhhhh…. we have to go back …. we. . we …. uhhhhhh …. forgot something…..
7. I’m sure everyone noticed the loss of an engine, however the reduction in weight and drag will mean we’ll be flying much more efficiently now.
8. Fasten your seat belt. more...
AAC Alter All CommandsAAD Alter All DataAAO Add And OverflowAAR Alter At RandomAB Add BackwardsABC AlphaBetize CodeABR Add Beyond RangeACC Advance CPU ClockACDC Allow Controller to Delete ContentsACDP Allow Controller to Die PeacefullyACQT Advance Clock to Quitting TimeADB Another Dumb BugAEE Absolve Engineering ErrorsAFF Add Fudge FactorAFHB Align Fullword on Halfword BoundaryAFP Abnormalize Floating PointAFR Abort Funny RoutineAFVC Add Finagle's Variable ConstantAGB Add GarBageAGWA Add and Get Wrong AnswerAI Add ImproperAIB Attack Innocent BystanderAIB Attack Innocent BystandersAISG Access and Improve Student GradeAMM Add Mayo and MustardAMM Answer My MailAMS Add Memory to SystemANC ANnoy ConsultantAOI Annoy Operator ImmediateAR Advance RudelyAR Alter RealityARN Add and Reset to Non-zeroARN Add and Reset to NonzeroARZ Add and Reset to ZeroAS Add SidewaysASQGSA ASCII Stupid Question, Get a Stupid ANSIAT Accumulate TriviaAWP Argue With ProgrammerAWTT Assemble With Tinker ToysBA Branch more...