Engineer Jokes / Recent Jokes

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked ayoung engineer fresh out of MIT, "What starting salary were you lookingfor?"The engineer replied, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, dependingon the benefits package."The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeksvacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matchingretirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years- say, a red Corvette?"The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replied, "Well Yeah, but you started it."

Three engineering students were discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It had to be a mechanical engineer, look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it had to be an electrical engineer, the nervous system is just a marvel of millions of electrical connections."
The third said, "Actually, it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline right through a recreational area?"

Doctors bury their mistakes, architects just plant ivy.

"Sunny. Don't get out first ball. It's a long way back to the pavilion."
Engineer was dismissed first ball.

Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked the young engineer, fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"
The engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."
The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a five-week vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching your retirement fund to 50% of your salary, and a new company car leased every two years... perhaps, a red Corvette?"
The young engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
The interviewer replied,
"Yeah, but you started it."

A Collection of Lawyer Jokes



An engineer, a physicist, and a lawyer were being interviewed for a position as chief executive officer of a large corporation. The engineer was interviewed first, and was asked a long list of questions, ending with "How much is two plus two?" The engineer excused himself, and made a series of measurements and calculations before returning to the board room and announcing, "Four." The physicist was next interviewed, and was asked the same questions. Before answering the last question, he excused himself, made for the library, and did a great deal of research. After a consultation with the United States Bureau of Standards and many calculations, he also announced "Four." The lawyer was interviewed last, and was asked the same questions. At the end of his interview, before answering the last question, he drew all the shades in the room, looked outside the door to see if anyone was there, checked the more...

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous systems many thousands of electrical connections."The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"