Favorite Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: What are Mike Tysons favorite words?
A: Let's take a bite out of Crime!!
What is the wasps favorite song? Just a Spoonful of Sugar.
Q. What is a lesbian's favorite thing to eat?
A. A Klondike Bar
As the elderly man lay dying in his bed, death's agony was suddenly pushed aside as he smelled the aroma of his favorite homemade chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs.
Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with intense concentration, supported himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands. In labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing wide-eyed into the kitchen.
There, spread out upon newspapers on the kitchen table were literally HUNDREDS of his favorite chocolate chip cookies! Was it heaven? Or, was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table, landing on his knees in a rumpled posture, one hand on the edge of the table.
The aged and withered hand quiveringly made its way to a cookie near the more...
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?" When do cannibals leave the table? When everyone's eaten. What is a cannibal's favorite type of TV show? A celebrity roast. What do cannibals eat for dessert? Chocolate covered aunts. What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner? The cold shoulder. What is a cannibal's favorite game? Swallow the leader. Have you heard about the cannibal restaurant? Dinner costs an arm and a leg. Did you hear about the cannibal who loved fast food? He ordered a pizza with everybody on it. Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school for buttering up his teacher? Cannibal: One who loves his fellow man with gravy. Cannibal's recipe book: How to Serve Your Fellow Man.
A middle-aged woman convinced her husband to attend a couples retreat.
At the first session, the facilitator said, "The fact is, no matter how long we've been married, there are many things we don't know about each other. For example, how many of you husbands can name your wife's favorite flower?"
The husband smiled knowingly, put his hand on his wife's knee, and said, "It's Pillsbury All-Purpose, right honey?"
What is a Chihuahuas favorite sport? Miniature golf!