Fax Jokes / Recent Jokes
It's that time of year again. You know, all full of holly, HO HO HO and snow. In fact I've just cleared the desktop in preparation for the celebration. Accountants are never too slow in doing their calculations, and this time of year is no exception.
A mystery "chain fax" that submits that the Father Christmas myth to scientific analysis has popped up in the City, much to the amusement of money men, who are chuckling at the sight of the bearded old fraud being ruthlessly audited. The analysis calculates that there are possibly 378 million children in the Christian world; at just over 4. 1 per household, that's 98. 1 million homes. "One presumes that there's at least one good child in each".
Time zones give Santa 31 hours of Christmas to work with, which means 822. 6 visits per second. "This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of his sleigh, fill the stockings. .. [and] get more...
A customer called to say he couldnt get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the screen and pressing the "send" key.
These are actual calls to Tech support help desks (Some of you may find this funny while others could possibly use this section as a reference) A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows." The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine." --------------------------------------- Tech Support: "How much free space do you have on your hard drive?" Customer: "Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?" --------------------------------------- Overheard in a computer shop: Customer: "I'd like a mouse mat, please." Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety." Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?" more...
GARAGE SALE: Place an add in the classified section of your local newspaper advertising a GIGANTIC Garage Sale listing the address of your victim. Advertise televisons, cam-corder, vintage automobile, antiques, etc. Sale begins at 6 a. m. Come early!
X-RAYS AT AIRPORTS: Purchase a large adult bedroom toy. Wrap it in a large amount of tin foil. Secretly hide it in a piece of the victims carry on luggage. As it goes through the airport x-ray machine the contents of the device will be shielded by the tin foil and will be unwrapped-inspected by airport security officials. This one will make your sides hurt from laughter, if present during the inspection. Good for both male and female victims.
LOST KEYS: Get a hold of some old useless keys (car, house, etc) Place victim's name, phone number and $50 reward...... if found and returned. Drop the keys in one of the least desirable areas of town.
PAPER MONEY: Write a sexually orientated solicitation message, more...