Flights Jokes / Recent Jokes

Bill, Jim and Scott were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75- story skyscraper. After a long day of meeting, they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill said to Jim and Scott, "Let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, Jim can sing songs for the next 25 flights and Scott can tell us sad stories for the rest of the way. At the 26th floor, Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car.!!!!!!"

Three guys went on spring vacation and booked three rooms at a
hotel. When they got to the hotel the clerk said there were no
reservations in the computer for them but they had an opening in
a suite they had.

So they said okay.

Then the clerk gave them the key, said it was on the 30th floor and the elevator was broken so they would have to use the stairs.
They said okay and made a deal the first guy would tell funny stories the 1st ten flights.

The second guy would tell scary stories the 2nd ten flights, and
the third would tell sad stories the last ten flights.

So the first told stories and they walked slow.

Then the second guytold stories and they sped up when they got scared.

Last the 3rd guy told sad stories and at the last stair he said, "Want to here the saddest story in the world" and the other guys said okay tell us.

He said, "I left the key in the lobby."

Fred, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75-story skyscraper.

After a long day of meetings, they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room.

Bill said to Jim and Scott, "Let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, Jim can sing songs for the next 25 flights, and Scott can tell sad stories for the rest of the way."

At the 26th floor, Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing.

At the 51st floor, Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories.

"I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!"

Editor's Note: It's dry parody. You gotta really like sci-fi to enjoy this one...

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Experiment 8 Postflight Summary
NASA publication 14-307-1792
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ABSTRACT

The purpose of this experiment was to prepare for the expected participation in long-term space based research by husband-wife teams once the US space station is in place. To this end, the investigators explored a number of possible approaches to continued marital relations in the zero-G orbital environment provided by the XXXXXX shuttle mission.

Our primary conclusion is that satisfactory marital relations are within the realm of possibility in zero-G, but that many couples would have difficulty getting used to the approaches we found to be most satisfactory.

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INTRODUCTION

The more...

For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9A. M. on the dot. He had never missed a day and was never late.

Consequently, when on one particular day 9 A. M. passed without Johnson's arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor.

Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway. Nearly killed myself."

And the boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"

For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9A. M. on the dot. He had never missed a day and was never late. Consequently, when on one particular day 9 A. M. passed without Johnson's arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor. Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway. Nearly killed myself." And the boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"

For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9 a.m. on the dot; he had never missed a day and was never late.
Consequently, when on one particular day 9 a.m. passed without Johnson's arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor.
Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway - nearly killed myself."
The boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"