Forgetting Jokes

The probability of forgetting something is directly proportional to... to... uh... oh never mind

I'm always forgetting things," the distraught man grumbled to the psychiatrist. "What should I do?"
"The first thing to do," the doctor prescribed, "is pay me in advance."

EQUIPMENT VIOLATIONS - ELECTRIC
* Forgetting strap $10
* Changing strings after every set $15
* Using electric tuner $15
* Setting up mic "just in case" $75
* Forgetting to turn amp on $40
* Bringing amp larger than 1 person can carry in 1 trip $50
* Asking horn player for help moving amp $25
* Bringing custom-made bass $100 per string above 4
* Bringing more than 1 bass $100 per extra bass
* Skull decals on bass $150
* Bringing fretless bass $500