Gang Jokes / Recent Jokes

The ringleader of a gang of theives masterminded a job on a lawyer's house. The gang broke in without realizing that the owner was holding his weekly poker game in the back with a group of lawyer buddies.

To the leader's chagrin, two hours later the theives walked out the front door, shaking the owner's hand.

"What happened in there?" asked the leader.

The group explained that in mid-job they came upon the room with the lawyers in it. "It's ok," explained one. "We got out, with $50."

"Fifty dollars!" exclaimed the leader. "You went in with $500!"

"Yeah," said another, "But we had to pay a retainer. Apparently, somebody is pursuing some kind of criminal charges against us, and the lawyers explained that it was a good idea to get representation."

Yo Mama is so old she used to gang bang with the Flintstone's!

A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money. The gang was very happy to escape.
"It ain't so bad," one crook noted. "We got $25 between us."
The boss screamed: "I warned you to stay clear of lawyers! We had $100 when we broke in!"

1. What does a sorority girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Her ankles.
2. What is the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only put three fingers in a bowling ball.
You could eat a bowling ball if you had to.
You can't fit a sorority girl inside a bowling ball.
3. How are a sorority girl and a bowling ball alike?
You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in
the gutter and they always come back for more.
4. What is the difference between sorority girls and hookers?
Sorority girls cost less per score.
5. What is the difference between a sorority girl and an elephant?
About 40 lbs.
How do you equalize the two?
Feed the elephant.
6. What's the first thing a sorority girl does in the morning?
Walks home.
7. What's the difference between a sorority girl and the Titanic?
Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.
8. How can you tell if a sorority girl has more...

A guy just died and he's at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while St. Peter is leafin' through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy.
St. Peter goes through the Book several times, furrows his brow and says to the guy, 'You know, I can't see that you ever did anything really bad in your life, but you never did anything really good either. If you can point to even one REALLY GOOD DEED - you're in.'
The guy thinks for a moment and says, 'Yeah, there was this one time when I was driving down the highway and saw a giant group of Biker Gang Rapists assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going on and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of 'em ripping the clothes off this terrified young woman.
Infuriated, I got out of my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and walked up to the leader of the gang, a Huge Guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the Biker Gang more...

A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old lawyers gave them a fight for their lives. The gang was very happy to escape.' It ain't so bad,' one crook noted.' We got out with $25 between us.'' I warned you to stay clear of lawyers!' the boss screamed.' We had over $100 when we broke in!'

A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions
gave them a fight for their life and their money. The gang was very happy to escape.“It ain't so bad,” one crook noted. “We got $25 between us.”The boss screamed, “I warned you to stay clear of lawyers! We had $100 when we broke in!”