Goofy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Politically Correct ways to tell someone they are goofy: A few clowns short of a circus. A few fries short of a happy meal. The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead. All foam, no beer. The butter has slipped off his pancake. The cheese slid off his cracker. Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. As smart as bait. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash. Her sewing machine's out of thread. One fruit loop shy of a full bowl. Her antenna doesn't pick up all the channels. His belt doesn't go through all the loops. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. Receiver is off the hook. Not wired to code. Skylight leaks a little. Her slinky's kinked. Too much yardage between the goal posts. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together. A photographic memory, but the lens cover is on. more...

One day Mickey Mouse woke up and Minnie wasn't there. He went to look for her and, as he stepped outside, he saw "Mickey sucks" written in a yellow liquid in the snow. He investigated and realizedthere was good news and bad news: it was Goofy's urine, but Minnie's handwriting.

There was this elephant at a circus. And at this circus
there was a prize award to be given to whomever can
make this elephant sit. So many tried and failed, Until
this goofy looking guy came by. so the elephant trainer
asked, "you can make this elephant sit hahahaha"
ok if you succedd ill give you 5 thousand dollars
so the guy walks over to the elephant and kindly asks
the elephant to sit, but no luck. So he kicks the
elephant hard and whoop the elephant sit down out of pain. huh the trainer
replies ok you win here ya go. .
a week later another contest is abroad, but this time the trainer implies,
"anyone who can make this elephant say yes and no without physically touching
him
i will give 1 hundred thousand they must give me
5 thousand to play which if they win they would surley get it back... The
trainer thinking this would be impossible trys out the contast. many tried
walking from left more...