Gray Jokes / Recent Jokes

Welcome to the LoveMaker! (v3. 1 Erosoft Industries, (c) 1993)
At the prompt, please enter your response.
I am the LOVEMAKER. A personalized, interactive poetry assistance program.
What is your name?
%JOHN
What a nice name, JOHN. You must be a man.
%YES
How nice for you. Who is your poem for, JOHN?
%SHEILA
How nice for SHEILA. She must be a woman?
%YES
SHEILA must be very special to you, JOHN. Is she?
%YES
What is the occasion, JOHN?
%VALENTINE'S DAY
SHEILA is a very lucky woman. I will need information about SHEILA
for a poem that best reflects your deep feelings for her, JOHN.
What color are her eyes?
%BLUE
Thank you, JOHN. But could you be more specific? Are they blue like
the sky after a clearing storm? Are they the icy blue of the far flung
fjords, shrouded in mist and mystery? Are they the steely blue of Walter
Gropius's later Bauhaus sketchbooks? Are they a cornflower more...

Why did the gray whale go on a diet? Because he wasnt a Fin whale!

What's gray and comes in packets?
Instant elephant.
What's gray and comes in buckets?
An elephant.
What's gray and has a trunk?
A mouse going on holiday.
How do elephants hide in cherry trees?
They paint their toe-nails red.
How do elephants get down from cherry trees?
Sit on a leaf and wait for fall.
How do elephants hide in custard?
Paint the soles of their feet yellow and hide upside down.

What's gray, has four legs, and a trunk?
A mouse on vacation.

Buy A Dumpster, Paint It Gray And Live In It For 6 Months Straight.
Run All Of The Piping And Wires Inside Your House On The Outside Of The Walls.
Pump 10 Inches Of Nasty, Crappy Water Into Your Basement, Then Pump It Out, Clean Up, And Paint The Basement "Deck Gray." Repeat.
Every Couple Of Weeks, Dress Up In Your Best Clothes And Go The Scummiest Part Of Town, Find The Most Run Down, Trashy Bar You Can, Pay $10 Per Beer Until You're Hammered, Then Walk Home In The Freezing Cold.
Perform A Weekly Disassembly And Inspection Of Your Lawnmower.
On Mondays, Wednesdays, And Fridays Turn Your Water Temperature Up To 200 Degrees, Then On Tuesday And Thursday Turn It Down To 10 Degrees. On Saturdays, And Sundays Declare To Your Entire Family That They Used Too Much Water During The Week, So All Showering Is Secured.

Some more terms for the TECHNO OFFICE DICTIONARY

Perot To quit unexpectedly, as in' My cellular phone just perot'ed.'

CLM (Career-Limiting Move) Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

Treeware Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.

Dead Tree Edition The paper version of a publication available in both paper and electronic forms, as in:' The dead tree edition of the San Francisco Chronicle...'

Dilberted To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character.' I've been dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week.'

World Wide Wait The real meaning of WWW.

CGI Joe A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a plastic action figure.

Dorito Syndrome Feelings of more...

What's pink and gray and wrinkly and old and belongs to Grandpa monster? - Grandma monster