Heels Jokes / Recent Jokes

New from MATTEL: Administrative Barbie: Works twelve hour days for little pay (70% of Admin Ken's salary), and is the lowest on the totem pole despite being the one that actually runs the group. Comes with mini laptop and directions for the coffee machine. Pull the string on her back and she'll schedule a meeting with your other dolls, replace the toner cartridge in the laser printer, coordinate a re-org and a move, and order airline tickets for Admin Ken.

Temp Barbie: This smartly dressed, intelligent, hard-working and enthusiastic Barbie is ready to go right out of the box, but usually goes untouched for at least a day while everyone tries to figure out why they bought her. Pull the string on her back and she'll stuff envelopes indefinitely, all the while wondering why she got a liberal arts degree. Comes with mini resume and mini filing cabinet filled with the past five years worth of US Tax Code revisions which need to be collated.

Sister Mary Barbie: This more...

The things I've learnt from porn:
Women wear high heels to bed.
A blowjob will always get a woman out of a speeding fine.
Lesbians love it when a guy bursts in on them.
All women are bisexual or have fantasised about it.
No man is bisexual.
Women hitchhike in high heels and bikinis and will always offer you sex in exchange for a ride to who knows where.
If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having a root in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash you if you join in without asking.
Job interviews often turn into orgies.
Nurses give patients blowjobs especially if they have multiple bandages or are in a coma. The patient always makes a miraculous recovery.
When a complete stranger asks a sunbathing woman to rub suntan lotion over her breasts she doesn't tell him to F#@% off.
She will insist he roots her.
Calling a woman a bitch won't get you thrown out of bed. It turns her on even more.
French maids and baby sitters are more...