Illegal Jokes / Recent Jokes

Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog. Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. Tattoos are banned. It is illegal to wear your boots to bed. Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus. Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car. Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state. Whale hunting is strictly prohibitted throughout the entire state of Oklahoma.In Tulsa, Oklahoma the limit on kisses is three minutes (by law).Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger. It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle.
One may not promote a "horse tripping event". No one may spit on a sidewalk. Ada: If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail. Hawthahorne: It is unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window. Oklahoma City: No more...

Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing. Dishes must drip dry. Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays. One may not bathe without wearing "suitable clothing," i.e., that which covers one's body from neck to knee. Eugene: It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays. Eugene: It is legal to conduct a horse race or a symphony concert. Hood River: Juggling is strictly prohibited without a license. Klamath Falls: It's illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane. Portland: It's against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a skating rink. Portland: People may not whistle underwater. Portland: You cannot wear roller skates in restrooms. Marion: Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon. Myrtle Creek: One may not box with a kangaroo. Salem: Women may not wrestle in Salem. Springfield: It is illegal to own a reptile within the city limits, unless you are a school or city, as a more...

South Carolina: Remember The Civil War? We Didn`t Actually Surrender
A short story...
Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.
How do you know when you`re staying in a South Carolina hotel?
"When you call the front desk and say "I`ve gotta leak in my sink."
and the person at the front desk says "go ahead".
South Carolina: Just south of North Carolina
Dumb South Carolina Laws
It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop more...

Eugene: It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays.(Oregon Dumb Laws)

Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a license to play games on Sunday. It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley. It is illegal to challenge someone to a duel, or accept a duel, even it it is never actually fought. Penalty: Imprisonment for one to seven years. Impersonating a town sealer, auctioneer, corder of wood, or a fence-viewer is against the law. Penalty: $20 to $100 fine. It is illegal to place a windmill within twenty-five (25) rods of any traveled street or road. Riding a horse over any public highway for the purpose of racing, or testing the speed of the horse is illegal. Penalty: Maximum $20 fine and imprisonment for 10 days. It is illegal to coast downhill in your car with your transmission in neutral, or with the clutch disengaged. Newport: You cannot smoke a pipe after sunset. Providence: You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.

Tennessee The Educashun State
Dumb Tennessee Laws
You can`t shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
Hollow logs may not be sold.
Any person crippling, killing or in any way destroying a proud female dog that is running at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such killing or destruction.
More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel.
It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
Crimes against nature" are prohibited.
Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging.
Driving is not to be done while asleep.
The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
Dyersburg
It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
Fayette County
You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
Lenoir City
When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the more...

Horses may not be kept in bathtubs. By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide. Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks. When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic. It is considered an offense to get a tattoo. Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal. Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday. No work may be done on Sunday. An exception is that light bulbs may be sold. All schools must prepare a suitable program for Francis Willard Day. Dance halls may not operate on Sundays. Merchandise may not be sold within a half mile of a church unless fruit is being sold. A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people. Railroad more...