Illegal Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three cowboys are sitting around a campfire, out on a lonesome Texas prarie, each with the bravado for which cowboys are famous. A night of tall tales begins.
The first one says, "I must be the meanest, toughest cowboy there is. Why, just the other day a bull got loose in the corral and gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns with my bare hands."
The second cowboy can`t stand to be bested. "Why that`s nothing. I was walking down the trail yesterday and a fifteen-foot rattlesnake slid out from under a rock and made a move for me. I grabbed that snake with my bare hands, bit its head off and sucked the poison down in one gulp. And I`m still here today."
The third cowboy remained silent, silently stirring the coals with his hands.
A short story...
If a cowboy rode into town on Friday and left three days later on Friday. How the heck did it happen?
Answer: The horse`s name is Friday
Dumb Texas Laws
When two more...

Klamath Falls: It`s illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane.(Oregon Dumb Laws)

You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile. It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish. Driving is not to be done while asleep. It is legal to gather and consume road kill The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.Hollow logs may not be sold. More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel. Stealing a horse is punishable by hanging. Dyersburg: It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date. Fayette County: You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property. Lenoir City: When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming. Lexington: No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk. Lexington: Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited. Knoxville: In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a "hitching post." Memphis: Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of more...

In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day. No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth. Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you -- or holding you in his arms. Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown -- if they're nude.(Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds! The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to provide more...

It is against the law to fish from horseback. It is illegal not to drink milk. Birds have the right of way on all highways. It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list. It is considered an offense to hunt whales. It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.In Utah when a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin. A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. Kaysville: You must have identification to enter a convenience store after dark. Logan: Women may not swear. Monroe: Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor. Provo: Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine. Salt Lake City: No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin. Trout Creek: Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.

Five Englishmen in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border. The Italian customer agent stops them and tells them: "Itsa illegal to putta fiva people ina Quattro." "What do you mean it's illegal?" asked the Englishmen. "Quattro means four," replies the Italian official. "Quattro is just the name of the automobile," the Englishmen says disbelievingly. "Look at the papers: this car is designed to carry 5 persons." "You can'ta pulla thata one ona me," replies the Italian customs agent."Quattro means four. You hava fiva people ina your car and you are therefore breakin'a the law". The Englishmen reply angrily, "You idiot! Call your supervisor over We want to speak to someone with more intelligence!" "Sorry," responds the Italian official, "he can'ta come"."He's a busy with two guys in a Uno".

Whistling underwater is illegal At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole. Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.It is illegal to deny the existence of God Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week- - on Saturday night.