Imagine Jokes / Recent Jokes

Aug. 12 Moved to our new home in Montana. It is so beautiful here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see the snow covering them.Oct. 14 Montana is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves have turned all colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the beautiful mountains and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth. This must be paradise! I love it here.Nov. 11 Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon. I love it here.Dec. 2 It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleared the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight, I won. Than the snowplow came by. We had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place! I love Montana! Dec. 12 More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did it's trick again to the driveway. I more...

1. MILKING IT: When stroking a guy's dick don't grab it like a bus rail and start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don't use the penis as if it's a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms. The male organ is a thing of wonder and beauty, and should be worshipped and held tenderly at all times. The sensitive part is at the top (where your face should be), not two-thirds of the way down.

2. BEING NAKED: Very few female bodies are good to look it so please make an effort to cover up as much as possible with exotic lingerie. Match the outfit to suit your bod. If you've got a half-decent arse but no tits for example, wear stockings and suspenders and cover your meagre mammaries with something silky.

3. POOR PRESENTATION: Presentation is all important. Don't wait to be asked to get it doggy-style. Roll over and present. You know you love it!

4. SILENT FRIGHT: If you've come and cannot be arsed to scream to show your appreciation, at least more...

Extracted from a diary (true story they say..)
Aug. 12 - Moved to our new home in Canada. I am so excited. It's so beautiful here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see them with snow covering them.
Oct. 14 - Canada--it is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves have turned all colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the beautiful countryside and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth. This must be paradise. I love it here!
Nov. 11 - Remembrance Day. Deer season starts soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it snows soon. I love it here!
Dec. 2 - It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won). When the snow plough came by we had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful more...