Improvement Jokes

Normal people believe that "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." Engineers believe that "If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet"

rk Twain's plan for the improvement of spelling

A young boy was in grade four and was having a terrible time with his math.
His parents worked with him night after night but there was no improvement.
His math marks were dismal. His parents in desperation decided to transfer their son to a new school. They decided to try the Catholic school system but not until after they had given the matter serious consideration as both parents were not religious.
They checked around and the school seemed to have a good academic record. They reluctantly enrolled their son in the Catholic school. Immediately the boy's math marks soared. He went from a failing grade to become an A student.
His parents were surprised at the change and over dinner one night they asked their son about his improvement. "Was it better teaching" they asked and the boy said "No the teachers are about the same". "Was it a different text book?" Again the boy said "No it is the same text book"
Finally they asked more...

A young boy was in grade four and was having a terrible time with his math.
His parents worked with him night after night but there was no improvement.
His math marks were dismal. His parents in desperation decided to transfer their son to a new school. They decided to try the Catholic school system but not until after they had given the matter serious consideration as both parents were not religious.
They checked around and the school seemed to have a good academic record. They reluctantly enrolled their son in the Catholic school. Immediately the boy's math marks soared. He went from a failing grade to become an A student.
His parents were surprised at the change and over dinner one night they asked their son about his improvement. "Was it better teaching" they asked and the boy said "No the teachers are about the same". "Was it a different text book?" Again the boy said "No it is the same text book"
Finally they asked more...

1.When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes, and girls love That.
2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness(or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)
3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. they love to be roughed up.
4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is say "you better be", repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.
5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement, and every girl needs some improvement.
6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewellery is for pussy's and Asian more...