Indigenous Jokes / Recent Jokes

TOP TEN RESONS TO BE A NEW ZEALANDER
1 RUGBY
2 YOU PLAY RUGBY AND HAVE YOUR HEAD BETWEEN TO OTHER PLAYERS ARSES AND STILL THINK YOU ARE NOT GAY
3 STILL PLAYING RUGBY KEEP LIFTING PLAYER FROM CRUTCH OF THERE LEGS WITH YOUR HANDS AND STILL THINK THAT YOU ARE NOT GAY
4 IF YOU ARE THE INDIGENOUS NATIVE YOU CAN WELCOM VISITOR'S BY SHOWING YOUR ARSE TO THEM
5 AFTER SHOWING YOUR ARSE YOU CAN RUB YOUR RUNNY NOSE ON THER NOSE.
6 YOU CAN BE THE WOMEN PRIME MINISTER AND STILL ONLY WEAR MALE PANTS TO EVERY PLACE YOU GO.
7 CAN BE THE SHEEP SHEARING CHAMPION OF THE WORLD
8 CAN BE THE GUM BOOT THROWING CHAMPION OF THE WORLD
9 THINK THREE COURSE MEAL IS BREAD BUTTER AND JAM
10 IF YOU CAN BE RELATED TO THE INDIGENOUS PEOPLE OF THE COUNTRY WITH GOVERNEMENT ASSISTENCE YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORK EVER.

A very enthusiastic officer from the Ministry of Agriculture was appointed to escort Mr Galbraith, fomer US ambassador to India, on a tour of the countryside. The young man went on endlessly about plans, projects, hydroelectric power, afforestation, compost pits, etc. In order to show some interest in his surroundings, Galbraith pointed to a clump of eucalyptus trees and asked,' Are they indigenous?'
'Oh, yes, sir, they are very indigenous,' replied the agriculture expert.' We got them from Australia.'