Irishmen Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two Irishmen, Abdul and Mohammed, are driving their camel across the
desert. At the last two oases, the camel has refused to drink, and is now
quite dry. They fear he will die of dehydration. They reach one more
oasis, and after Abdul and Mohammed have slacked their thirst, they start
to work on getting the camel to drink. No amount of urging, cursing, or
beating the camel sticks will get him to drink the water.
Finally, in desperation, Mohammed tells Abdul: "We will force him to drink.
I will grab his ears and push his head down into the water. Meanwhile, you
go around the back and suck.' Abdul agrees, and they begin the plan.
After several minutes have passed, Mohammed asks Abdul: "How are things
coming back there?" Abdul replies: "I think you have his head too low, all
I am getting is mud!"

EAR ABOUT THE 2 GAY IRISHMEN??? MICHAELFITZPATRICK OR PATRICHFITZMICHAEL lol VERY OLD JOKE 2NDONE LOL FATHER OBRIEN CA;;ED FORM LAST RIGHTS AT MACINCE SHOP! DO YOU THE IN THE FATHER THE AND THE SONA AND THE HOLY GHOSAT!!!??? GENTLEMAND DYINGS SAYS I AM DYINF YOUR GIVING ME RIDDLES lol

Back in the old west, there was a need to connect the east and the west with a telegraph line. The Manager of the project advertised for workers to complete the job. Three groups responded. A team of Irishmen, a group of Italians, and a final team composed of Blondes.
Since none of the groups would work with anyone from the other two groups, the project supervisor decided to assign each group to a different part of the line, and then see which team set the most poles.
The first task was to set the poles. The Supervisor sent each group out to a different location. Before they left, he advised all three groups that the one to bury the most poles today, would receive a bonus.
At the end of the day, the foreman of the Italians reported back to the Supervisor. The Supervisor inquired of him how many poles had been set by his team. He answered 48. The Supervisor was delighted. He advised the Italian to stay awhile until he heard how the Irishmen and the Blondes had more...

Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Shamus, were stumbling home late one night and found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard."Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "Its Michael OGradys grave, God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87." "Thats nothing," says Sean, "heres one named Patrick OToole. It says here that he was 95 when he died." Just then, Shamus yells out, "But heres a fella that died when he was 145 years old!""What was his name?" asks Paddy. Shamus lights a match to see what else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles, from Dublin."

Two Irishmen were digging a ditch directly across from a brothel. Suddenly, they saw a rabbi walk up to the front door, glance around and duck inside. "Ah, will you look at that?" One ditch digger said." What's our world comin' to when men of th' cloth are visitin' suchplaces?" A short time later, a Protestant minister walked up to the door andquietly slipped inside. "Do you believe that?" The workman exclaimed." Why,' tis no wonder th' young people today are so confused, what withthe example clergymen set for them." After an hour went by, the men watched as a Catholic priest quicklyentered the whore house. "Ah, what a pity," the digger said, leaningon his shovel. "One of th' poor lasses must be ill."

Two Irishmen were sitting in a four engined plane flying back from a shopping trip to Paris when the captains voice came over the loudspeaker. "Ladies and Gentlemen, one of the engines appears to have failed. There's nothing to worry about but we will be 15 minutes late in landing at Gatwick." Five minutes later he said, "Nothing to worry about, ladies and Gentlemen, but one of the other engines has failed, and we will now be an hour late." A moment later, "Er... sorry about this ladies and gentlemen, but the third engine has also given up the ghost and we will now be two hours later than expected." One of the Irishmen tapped his friend on the shoulder. "Good heavens, Patrick, do you realise that if the other engine fails, we'll be here all night? "

Two Irishmen were sitting in a four engined plane flying back from a shopping trip to Paris when the captains voice came over the loudspeaker. "Ladies and Gentlemen, one of the engines appears to have failed. There's nothing to worry about but we will be 15 minutes late in landing at Gatwick."Five minutes later he said, "Nothing to worry about, ladies and Gentlemen, but one of the other engines has failed, and we will now be an hour late."A moment later, "Er... sorry about this ladies and gentlemen, but the third engine has also given up the ghost and we will now be two hours later than expected."One of the Irishmen tapped his friend on the shoulder. "Good heavens, Patrick, do you realise that if the other engine fails, we'll be here all night? "