Kissed Jokes / Recent Jokes

Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob went straight over to Joe`s place. When they got to the door, Joe went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her. Once they were working on the deck, Bob told Joe that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Joe said that he`d started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage, and things couldn`t be better. Bob thought he`d give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears. Bob was confused and asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my life. First, little Billy fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you come home drunk!"

CONCERNING THE ORIGINS OF LOVE
"Cupid kissed God and that got the ball rollin'."
Julio, age 9
"One of the Greek lady gods got a crush on one of the Greek man gods.
he tried to hit her with lightning and thunderbolts, but he just
couldn't get her away from him... After a while, they became the
first married gods.
Robbie, age 8
CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE
"One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has
freckles too."
Andrew, age 6
"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do
with how you smell...That's why perfume and deodorant are so
popular.
Mae, age 9
"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but
the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful."
Manuel, age 8
ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE
"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life."
John, age more...

Three fellows walking along the beach noticed a mermaid sitting on a rock swishing her tail in the foam. The first man waded out to her and said, Hello mermaid! Have you ever been kissed?" She replied, "no sir!" So he kissed her quite thoroughly and asked, "Did you like that?" "Oh, indeed I did, sir!" she replied The second man went out to her and asked,"Mermaid, have you ever had your breasts fondled?" "No sir," she replied. So he set to and fondled and caressed and then asked, "How did you like that?" She replied," It was most pleasurable, sir." The third fellow approached and asked," Mermaid, have you ever been fucked?" "No sir," she replied. He said, "Well you have been now--the tide's gone out!"

A guy was walking down the beach when he came upon a girl with no arms and no legs crying. He asked her why she was crying and she said, "i have never been hugged!" So he hugged her. But she still cried. So he asked her what was wrong now and she said, "I have never been kissed!" So the man kissed her. But she still cried. He asked her why she was still crying and she said, "I have never been screwed!" So he picked her up and threw her into the water and said, "Your screwed now!"

Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob just went straight over to Joe's place. When they got to the door, Joe went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her.
Once they were working on the deck, Bob told Joe that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Joe said that he'd started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage, and things couldn't be better.
Bob thought he'd give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears.
Bob was confused and asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my life. First, little Billy fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you come home more...

Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob justwent straight over to Joe's place. When they got to the door, Joe went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was
and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her.Once they were working on the deck, Bob told Joe that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Joe said that he'd started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage, and things couldn't be
better.Bob thought he'd give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears.Bob was confused and asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my life. First, little Billy fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And
now, you come home more...

Three fellows walking along the beach noticed a mermaid sitting on a rock swishing her tail in the foam. The first man waded out to her and said, Hello mermaid! Have you ever been kissed?" She replied, "no sir!" So he kissed her quite thoroughly and asked, "Did you like that?" "Oh, indeed I did, sir!" she replied The second man went out to her and asked,"Mermaid, have you ever had your breasts fondled?" "No sir," she replied. So he set to and fondled and caressed and then asked, "How did you like that?" She replied," It was most pleasurable, sir." The third fellow approached and asked," Mermaid, have you ever been fucked?" "No sir," she replied. He said, "Well you have been now-the tide's gone out!"