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Cities of Sjlbvdnzv, Grzny to Be First RecipientsBefore an emergency joint session of Congress yesterday, President Clinton announced US plans to deploy over 75, 000 vowels to the war-torn region of Bosnia. The deployment, the largest of its kind in American history, will provide the region with the critically needed letters A, E, I, O and U, and is hoped to render countless Bosnian names more pronounceable." For six years, we have stood by while names like Ygrjvslhv and Tzlynhr and Glrm have been horribly butchered by millions around the world," Clinton said. "Today, the United States must finally stand up and say `Enough.' It is time the people of Bosnia finally had some vowels in their incomprehensible words. The US is proud to lead the crusade in this noble endeavour." The deployment, dubbed Operation Vowel Movement by the State Department, is set for early next week, with the Adriatic port cities of Sjlbvdnzv and Grzny slated to be the first recipients. Two more...

Did you know in 1923, the following men were considered some of the world's most successful men... at least they found the secret of making money. Whereas, in 1987, more than 60 yrs. later, do you know what became of these men?
The president of the largest steel company, Charles Schwab, died a pauper. The president of the largest gas company, Howard Hopson, went insane. The president of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad insolvent. The president of the Bank of International Settlement shot himself and the greatest bear on Wall Street, Casabee Rivermore, died by suicide.
The same year, 1923, the winner of the most important golf championship, Gene Sarazen, won the US Open and the PGA tournaments. Today he is still playing golf and is solvent.
Conclusion: Stop worrying about business and play golf!

*The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.
* The Boston University Bridge (on Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, Massachusetts) is the only place in the world where a boat can sail under a train driving under a car driving under an airplane.
* Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only have about ten.
* Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
* David Prowse, was the guy in the Darth Vader suit in Star Wars. He spoke all of Vader's lines, and didn't know that he was going to be dubbed over by James Earl Jones until he saw the screening of the movie.
* Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.
* In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
* Barbie's measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33.
* February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not more...

There's this guy and he lives in the second largest state in America, which is California, and he want's to live in the largest state of America which is Alaska. So he goes there for a few weeks and decides he wants to become a fully-fledged Alskan, so he goes in this pub to ask a bar man what he has to do to become a fully fledged Alaskan. The barnabs say's "First you drink this liter of whisky, then you've got to kill a bear, and find a woman and rape her." The guy gets confused, so he asked the barman to repeat it. He comes back a week later beaten to shit." What happened to you?" said the barman." I'm nearly a fully fledged alaskan, all I gotta do now is kill a woman"!

Driving through Oklahoma, my husband and I went out of our way to stop at what was billed as the largest McDonald's in the world.
However, we were less than thrilled when an employee addressed everyone over the intercom: "Attention, world's largest McDonald's customers."

I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world. Perhaps you've seen it.

The fully fledged alaskan
There's this guy and he lives in the second largest state in America, which is California, and he want's to live in the largest state of America which is Alaska.
So he goes there for a few weeks and decides he wants to become a fully-fledged Alskan, so he goes in this pub to ask a bar man what he has to do to become a fully fledged Alaskan.
The barnabs say's "First you drink this liter of whisky, then you've got to kill a bear, and find a woman and rape her."
The guy gets confused, so he asked the barman to repeat it.
He comes back a week later beaten to shit.
"What happened to you?" said the barman.
"I'm nearly a fully fledged alaskan, all I gotta do now is kill a woman"!