Laws Jokes / Recent Jokes
Dumb Wisconsin laws and humor, relating to many aspects of the state, its weather, and its people.
Wisconsin Crazy Law Dumb Wisconsin Laws At one time, margarine was illegal.
Oliver’s Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are. Orben’s Packaging Discovery: For the first time in history, one bag of groceries produces two bags of trash. Osborn’s Law: Variables won’t, constants aren’t. Ozman’s Laws: (1) If someone says he will do something “without fail, ” he won’t. (2) The more people talk on the phone, the less money they make. (3) People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn’t. (4) Pizza always burns the roof of your mouth. O’Reilly’s Law of the Kitchen: Cleanliness is next to impossible O’Toole’s Commentary On Murphy’s Law: Murphy was an optimist. Parkinson’s Laws: First Law - Work expands to fill the time available for its completion. Second Law - Expenditures rise to meet income. Fourth Law - The number of people in any working group tends to increase regardless of the amount of work to be done. Law of Committees - The amount of time spent by a committee on an agenda item is inversely proportional to more...
Dumb Wyoming laws and humor, relating to many aspects of the state, its weather, and its people.
Wyoming Crazy Law You may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June.
Dumb Alaska laws and humor, relating to many aspects of the state, its weather, and its people.
Alaska Crazy Law Alaska's More Important Laws
In Fairbanks it is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.
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While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.
It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
It is the state policy that emergencies are held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist.-Sec. 44. 62. 270. State policy.
Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
Murphy's Laws Of Parenting... A child will not spill on a dirty floor. A lot of time has been wasted arguing over what came first, the chicken or the egg. It was undoubtedly the rooster. A young child is a noise with dirt on it. A youth becomes a man when the marks he wants to leave on the world have nothing to do with tires. An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys. Celibacy is not hereditary. Familiarity breeds children. For adult education, nothing beats children. God invented mothers because he couldn't be everywhere at once and God invented guilt so mothers could be everywhere at once. Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain. Having children will turn you into your parents. If a child looks like his father, that's heredity; if he looks like a neighbor, that's environment. If you have trouble getting your children's attention, just sit down and look comfortable. Ill-bred children always display their pest manners. Insanity is inherited; more...
MURPHY`S LAWS ON WORK
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
Don`t be irreplaceable, if you can`t be replaced, you can`t be promoted.
The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
Never ask two questions in a business letter. The reply will discuss the one you are least interested in, and say nothing about the other.
When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
If at first you don`t succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.
Mother said there would be days like this, but she never said there would be so many.
Keep your boss`s more...
Galbraith`s Law of Human Nature: Faced with the choice between changing one`s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof.
Gerrold`s Laws of Infernal Dynamics: 1. An object in motion will always be headed in the wrong direction. 2. An object at rest will always be in the wrong place. 3. The energy required to change either one of these states will always be more than you wish to expend, but never so much as to make the task totally impossible.
Gilb`s Laws Of Unreliability: 1) At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer. 2) Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable. 3) Udetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited. 4) Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the probable cost of errors, or until someone insists on more...