Legs Jokes / Recent Jokes
A guy was walking along the beach admiring the beautiful sunset when he noticed a young lady laying in the sand, she had no arms and no legs and was crying.
He goes over and asked what was wrong. She said, "I am 21 years old, I have no legs and no arms and I have never been kissed".
So, he bends down and kisses her and she stops crying. He gets up to walk away and she starts to cry again.
Again, he asks her what is wrong.
She says, "I am 21 years old, I have no arms and no legs and I have never been screwed."
So, he goes over to her, picks her up and throws her in the water, and says - "there, now you're screwed"!
A guy was walking along the beach admiring the beautiful sunset when he noticed a young lady laying in the sand, she had no arms and no legs and was crying.He goes over and asked what was wrong. She said, "I am 21 years old, I have no legs and no arms and I have never been kissed".So, he bends down and kisses her and she stops crying. He gets up to walk away and she starts to cry again. Again, he asks her what is wrong.She says, "I am 21 years old, I have no arms and no legs and I have never been screwed."So, he goes over to her, picks her up and throws her in the water, and says - "there, now you're screwed"!
What do you call a dog with no legs? Hehe... it doen't matter, it's not going to come anyway! Sent by Melissa
A first grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first Grade. My sister is in the third grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third grade too!"
Ms Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer
any of his questions he was to go back to the first grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third grade more...
Q: What has eighteen legs and a pair of tits?
A: The Supreme Court.
Why are sheep always in a field? Because they can't get out!
Who gives my cat his Christmas presents? Santa Paws!
Who gives my other cat his Christmas presents? Santa Claws!
What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around while i go ahead!
Whats the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!
What did mary say to santa during the storm? Look at that rain, dear!
Where do plumbers buy there presents? Bath!
Why is it best to park your car near the moon? Because there is a lot of space!
What is the use of reindeer? It makes the garden grow sweetie!
How many legs does rudolph have? Four? No, six. - he's got forelegs and two back legs!
What game do six reindeer play in the back of a mini? Squash!
Why did the reindeer take his nose apart? To see what made it run!
What do you call a reindeer that has a number on its tail? Reg!
Did you hear the story of the 3 reindeer? No. Oh deer, Oh deer, Oh deer
Why do reindeers have more...