Louise Jokes / Recent Jokes

There's this young couple, Louise and Al, they've been married for about a year, and the bride isn't getting any sex. Just about every night hubby comes home, has a shower, gets changed and goes down to the pub. She's getting increasingly rampant as the days go on,
but each night she is disappointed.
Al comes home every night completely hammered and unfit for sexual activity. One particular night when Al gets in from work, Louise is seated provocatively on the sofa, wearing the skimpiest dress she has, suspenders, stockings, and very sexy lace panties and bra.
As is always the case, Al comes home runs upstairs, gets ready and goes to the pub. Once again Louise is rejected, so she sits back with a bottle of wine to console herself. Then at 11 pm (well before normal) she hears Al coming up the driveway and opening the front door. Louise re-adopts her sexually provocative pose on the sofa and to her surprise, Al's first words are, "Right woman, get upstairs - into the more...

There's this young couple, Louise and Al, they've been married for about a year, and the bride isn't getting any sex. Just about every night hubby comes home, has a shower, gets changed and goes down to the pub. She's getting increasingly rampant as the days go on, but each night she is disappointed.Al comes home every night completely hammered and unfit for sexual activity. One particular night when Al gets in from work, Louise is seated provocatively on the sofa, wearing the skimpiest dress she has, suspenders, stockings, and very sexy lace panties and bra.As is always the case, Al comes home runs upstairs, gets ready and goes to the pub. Once again Louise is rejected, so she sits back with a bottle of wine to console herself. Then at 11 pm (well before normal) she hears Al coming up the driveway and opening the front door. Louise re-adopts her sexually provocative pose on the sofa and to her surprise, Al's first words are, "Right woman, get upstairs - into the more...

As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them.

What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings were overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty.

One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don't sell those things at Wal-Mart.

I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, "What does this do?" "You're kidding me!" and "Who would buy that?"

Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the car pool lane during rush more...

Knock Knock
Who's there!
Louise!
Louise?
Louise coming to tea today!

The media have grotesquely skewed the public image of women who choose to own firearms. Unfortunately, such exposure can affect one's self-image. This test is offered in the hopes of putting these false images into a more proper perspective. Please circle your answers to each below: 1. What is the real meaning of that pink T-shirt with a revolver on it that says: "The ultimate in feminine protection"? 1. Obviously a plot by seditious gun fanatics from the NRA. 2. I'm amazed the pigs have no law banning women's T-Shirts. 3. A 9mm for "light days" and a. 44 Magnum for "heavy days". 2. For rape and assault prevention, a whistle is: 1. All you'll ever need. 2. Like I'd use yet another phallic symbol. 3. The signal to open Fire. 3. The movie "Thelma & Louise" was: 1. An insidious plot to stamp out femininity and glorify violence. 2. A male ploy to encourage further suppression of women. 3. A training film. 4. What was technically wrong with the scene more...

"It seemed like a great idea, except that we forgot that Grandma and Grandpa would be there... "



As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true, because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings were overflowed, his poor panty hose hung sadly empty and grew increasingly threadbare.

One year, I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and a fake beard and went in search of an inflatable love doll. Of course, they don't sell those things at Wal-mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown.

If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only confuse yourself. I was there almost three hours saying things like, "What does this do?" "You're kidding me!" "Who owns that?" "Do you have their phone more...

A long time patron of a local bawdy shows up at the door, greets the Madame asks for Louise. "Louise is on vacation" the Madame what about some other one of my lovely girls. No thank you. This offering a substitute and refusal goes on for several minutes with no success.

Finally the Madame asks, tell me what does Louise have that the other girls do not " patience explains the customer sighing patience."