Martinis Jokes / Recent Jokes
Two guys are riding to work on the bus, when they see a couple of dogs going at it on a lawn.
One guy, who's married, looks at the other and says, "Boy, I'd give just about anything to do it to my wife like that."
The other, a single guy, says, "Heck, that's easy. Just feed her three martinis."
The following morning, the same two guys are riding the bus to work. The single guy asks the other, "So, did you get to do it to your wife doggie style?"
The married guy replies, "Yes, but it took SIX martinis."
"SIX martinis! How come so many?" exclaims the single guy.
"Hell, it took three just to get her out on the lawn," replies the husband.
Two guys are riding to work on the bus. They both see two dogs goin' at it on a lawn. One guy, who's married, looks at the other and says, "Geez, I'd give anything to do it to my wife like that."
The other, a single guy, says, "Heck, that's easy. Just feed her three martinis."
The same two guys are riding the bus to work the next morning. The single one asks the other, "Well, did you get to do it to your wife doggie style?"
The married guy replies, "Yes, but it took SIX martinis."
The single guy exclaims, "SIX martinis! How come so many?"
The husband replies, "Hell, it took three just to get her out on the lawn."
Why don't elephants like martinis? Have you ever tried to get an olive out of your nose?
Why dont elephants like martinis? Have you ever tried to get an olive out of your nose?
Why I Fired My Secretary I woke up early, feeling depressed because it was my birthday, and I thought,"I'm another year older," but decided to make the best of it. So I showered andshaved, knowing when I went down to breakfast my wife would greet me with a bigkiss and say, "Happy birthday, dear." All smiles, I went in to breakfast, andthere sat my wife, reading her newspaper, as usual. She didn't say one word. SoI got myself a cup of coffee, made some toast and thought to myself, "Oh well, she forgot. The kids will be down in a few minutes, smiling and happy, and theywill sing 'Happy Birthday' and have a nice gift for me." There I sat, enjoyingmy coffee, and I waited. Finally, the kids came running into the kitchen, yelling, "Give me a slice of toast! I'm late! Where is my coat? I'm going tomiss the bus!" Feeling more depressed than ever, I left for the office. When I walked into the office, my secretary greeted me with a great big smileand a more...