Midget Jokes / Recent Jokes
This guy owns a horse stud farm, and gets a call from a friend. " I know
this midget with a speech impediment who wants to buy a horse, I'm
sending him over."
The midget arrives, and the owner asks if he wants a male or female
horse.
"A female horth," the midget replies. So the owner shows him one. "Nith
looking horth, can I thee her mouth?" So the owner picks up the midget
and shows him the horse's mouth. "Nith mouth. Can I thee her eyeth?"
So the owner picks up the midget and shows the eyes. "Ok, what about the
earth?" Now the owner is getting pissed, but he picks up the midget one
more time and shows the ears. "OK, finally, I'd like to see her twat."
With that, the owner picks up the midget and shoves his head up the
horse's ass, then pulls him out.
Shaking his head, the midget says, "perhapth I should rephrase. I'd like
to see her run!"
I have a friend name Dennis. Both his parents are midgets, but not Dennis. He's a midget dwarf. He's the guy who poses for trophies. - Steven Wright
An MG Midget pulled alongside a Rolls-Royce at a traffic light.
"Do you have a car phone?" its driver asked the guy in the Rolls.
"Of course I do," replied the haughty deluxe-car driver.
"Well, do you have a fax machine?"
The driver in the Rolls sighed. "I have that too."
"Then do you have a double bed in the back?" the Midget driver
wanted to know.
Ashen-faced, the Rolls driver sped off. That afternoon, he had a
mechanic install a double bed in his auto.
A week later, the Rolls driver passes the same MG Midget, which is
parked on the side of the road-back windows fogged up and steam
pouring out. The arrogant driver pulls over, gets out of the Rolls
and bangs on the Midget's back window until the driver sticks his head
out. "I want you to know that I had a double bed installed," brags
the Rolls driver.
The Midget driver is unimpressed. "You got me out of the more...
A tall woman met a midget at a party. The midget was barely three feet tall but they were attracted to each other. After a few drinks they went back to the tall woman's apartment." I can't imagine what it will be like making love to a midget," said the woman, "especially with the size difference and all." "Just take off your cloths, lie back on the bed, spread your legs apart and close your eyes," said the midget. The woman did as she was told and soon she felt the biggest thing she'd ever experienced inside her. Within a few minutes the woman had climaxed eight times." If you think that was good," said the midget with a smirk, "Just wait till I get BOTH legs in there!"
Three leprechans die and go to heaven.
The first one asks god "Are there any midget nuns in Ireland?" God said "No son, there are no midget nuns in Ireland" The second leprechan starts to giggle and the third one hushes him.
The first one asks god again " Are there any midget nuns in all of Europe?" God said "No son, there are no midget nuns in all of Europe" The second one laughs louder and the third one hushes him again.
So the first one asks "Are there any midget nuns in the whole world?" God replied "No son, there are no miget nuns in all of the world."
So this time the third one cracks up and the second one says "See, i told you, you fucked a penguin!"
Q: Why did they kick the midget out of the nudist colony?
A: He kept sticking his nose in everyone else's business!