Millionaire Jokes / Recent Jokes

A married couple was watching the show, "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?"
At the end of the show, the man said to his wife, "I think we will have an early night."
She answered, "Okay, but when I get to bed I am going straight to sleep."
And he said, "Is that you final answer?"
She replied, "Yes."
He said, "Okay, then I'm going to phone a friend."

Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5, 000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral. "Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said. The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $5, 000. Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. "That will be $5, 000 in principal, and $20. 30 in Interest", the loan officer said. The man wrote out a check and started to walk away. "Wait sir", the loan officer said, "while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $5, 000?" The man smiled. "Where else could I park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $20. 30?

Mick appeared on the Irish version of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" and towards the end of the programme had already won $500, 000.

"You've done very well so far," said the show's presenter, "but for $1 million you've only got one lifeline left - phone a friend.

Everything is riding on this question...... will you go for it?" "Sure," said Mick. "I'll have a go!" "OK.

The question is: which of the following birds does NOT build it's own nest?
(a) Robin, (b) Sparrow, (c) cuckoo, or (d) thrush."

"I haven't got a clue," said Mick, "so I'll use my last lifeline and phone my friend Paddy back home in Ballygoon." Mick called up his mate, told him the circumstances and repeated the question to him. "Fookin' ell, Mick!" cried Paddy. "Dat's simple...... it's a cuckoo." "Are you sure, Paddy?" asked Mick. "I'm fookin more...

A woman proudly told her friend, "I'm responsible for making my husband a millionaire.""Well what was he before he married you?" the friend asked."A billionaire."

Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He
kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had
a beautiful daughter who was single. One day he decides to throw a huge
party, and during the party he announces, "My dear guests... I have a
proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars or my
daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and
emerge unharmed!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a
large SPLASH!! There was one guy in the pool swimming with all he
could... the crowd cheered him on as he kept stroking. Finally, he made
it to the other side unharmed. The millionaire was impressed.
He said, "My boy that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think
it could be done! Well I must keep my end of the bargain... which do you
want, my daughter or the one million dollars?"
The guy says, more...

A husband and wife are watching' Who Wants To Be a Millionaire,' and the husband winks and says,' Honey, let's go upstairs...' The wife says no, so the husband asks again. Again she says no. So the husband says,' Is that your final answer?' The wife says yes. The husband says,' Well, can I phone a friend?'

A husband and wife are watching "Who Wants To Be a Millionaire," and the husband winks and says, "Honey, let's go upstairs..."
The wife says no, so the husband asks again. Again she says no.
So the husband says, "Is that your final answer?" The wife says yes.
The husband says, "Well, can I phone a friend?"