Musharraf Jokes / Recent Jokes
Queen Elizabeth, Bush & Musharraf died & went straight to hell. Queen Elizabeth said "I miss England, I want to call England and see how everybody is doing there. She called and talked for about 5 minutes, then she asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????
The devil says "Five million dollars". .
She wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on her chair. Bush was soo jealous, he starts screaming, "My turn! I wanna call the United States, I want to see how everybody is doing there too" He called and talked for about 2 minutes, then he asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????
The devil says "Ten million dollars" With a smug look on his face, he made a cheque and went to sit back on his chair. Musharraf was even more jealous & starts screaming, "I want to call Pakistan too, I wanna talk to the ministers, to the deputy, I wanna talk to everybody of my Parliment"..... He called
Pakistan and more...
This one comes from General Pervez Musharraf's trusted personal barber who had become infected by the popular demand for the restoration of democracy.
One morning, while clipping the president's hair he asked:' Gareeb pur war] When are you going to have elections in Pakistan?'
The president ignored the question with the contempt it deserved from a military dictator. At the next hair-cutting session, the barber asked:' Aalijahl Isn't it time you redeemed your promise to have elections?'
The president controlled his temper and remained silent.
At the third hair-clipping session the barber again blurted out:' Banda Nawaz, the awam (commofi people) are clamouring for elections; when will you order them?'
The president could not contain himself any longer and exploded:' Gaddaar I will have you taught a lesson you will never forget!' and he ordered his minions to take away the barber and give him ten lashes on his buttocks.
The barber fell at the'great man's more...
Perwez Musharraf and his wife are travelling in USA when they meet Santa Singh who is also travelling with his wife on a holiday. They start talking and realise that both are going to take the same train the next day. At the station Perwez buys tickets for himself and his wife. However he notices that Santa Singh buys a single ticket. "How are two people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks Pervez. "Just watch and you`ll see!" answers Santa. They all board the train and the Musharrafs take their seats and watch as Santa and his wife cram into a nearby restroom and close the door. The train departs and shortly afterwards the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on. The Musharrafs see all this and agree that it is a clever idea to save some money. So on their return trip, they more...
Musharraf calls Bush on 11th sept Musharraf Mr President, I would like to express my condolences to you. It is a real tragedy. So many people, such great buildings... I would like to ensure that we had nothing in connection with that........
Bush What buildings? What people??
Musharraf Oh, and what time is it in America now?
Bush It's eight in the morning.
Musharraf Oops... Will call back in an hour!
Musharraf and his driver were going to Military Air Base and were passing a farm. A pig jumped out in the road suddenly. The driver tried to get out of the way, but he hit him. He went in the farm to explain what had happened. He came out with a beer, a cigar, and a tons of money. Musharraf saw this and said, "My God, what did you tell them?" The driver replied, "I told them that I'm Musharraf's driver and I just killed the pig."
The Pakistani President, Gen Pervez Musharraf, is visiting his friend, U.S. President George Bush, in Washington, DC.
The U.S. President offers a gift to his guest. "Here you go, Mush" says Bush. "Try out this shiny new Cadillac. It's their finest model."
"Thank you, Mr. President, but I cannot accept this magnificent gift," replies the Musharraf.
"Oh. I understand about gift limits. I understand the problems you are having in Pakistan with your non-profit associations. Ok then... give me a half dollar for it. Then it won't be a gift," replies Bush. Musharraf gives Bush a dollar.
"I don't have any change... too bad," says the President.
"No big deal... you'll just give me two Cadillacs" retorts Musharraf.
In order to develop friendly relationship between the two countries, Vajpyee and Musharraf decided to visit each others country regularly.
The first visit was by Musharraf to India. There Vajpyee showed him Indians modern telecommunication systems. It was so good that Musharraf made a call to Zia-ul-Haq in hell and talked to him for 5 minutes! The bill for the call came to only Re. 1.
When Musharraf came back, he also wanted Pakistans telecommunication systems to be at the best when Vajpyee visited Pakistan. Suitable arrangements were made. Vajpyee came to Pakistan, visited the telecom department and talked to Rajiuv Gandhi in hell for 5 minutes. But this time, the bill was Rs. 500!
Vajpyee asked with a sarcastic smile - "Why are telephone calls to hell so costly in Pakistan? "
A High level diplomat gave a smiling reply - "From India to hell, it is a local call, Sir, while from Pakistan it is long distance!".