Parks Jokes
Funny Jokes
Montreal Gazette's Top 50 Jokes from the 1999 Just For Laughs festival. -----------------------------------------------------------------1. (On going to war over religion:) You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend. 2. I used to smoke pot until I came to the conclusion... what was that conclusion, anyway? 3. (On the difference between men and women:) On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars. 4. Women like posh hotels; there's more for them to steal. Take them to a posh hotel and they all turn into the Artful Dodger. 5. And God said, "Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything onSatan." 6. What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? "Hold my purse." 7. The Web brings people together because no matter what kind of a twisted sexual mutant you happen to be, you're got millions more...
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
A middle school science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?"
Little Mary stood up, angry, and said, "You should not be asking 6th graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, and you'll get fired!"She then sat back down.
Mrs. Parks ignored her, and asked the question again, "Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?"
"Anybody?" Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, "The body part that increases to 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye." Mrs. Parks said, "Very good, Billy."
Then she turned to Mary and continued, "As for you, young lady, I have 3 things to say: 1st, you have a dirty mind. 2nd, you didn't read your homework. And 3rd, one day you are going to be VERY, VERY disappointed."- Add a Useful Link
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