Particular Jokes / Recent Jokes

The setting is Ohio State University about six or seven years ago in a huge lecture hall (approximately 1000 students) for a Calculus final.Apparently this particular calculus teacher wasn't very well liked. He was one of those guys who would stand at the front of the class and yell out how much time was remaining before the end of a test, a real charmer.Since he was so busy galavanting around the room making sure that nobody cheated and that everyone was aware of how much time they had left before their failure on the test was complete, he had the students stack the completed tests on the huge podium at the front of the room. This made for quite a mess, remember there were 1000 students in the class.During this particular final, one guy entered the test needing a decent grade to pass the class. His only problem with Calculus was that he did poorly when rushed, and the lecturer standing in the front of the room, barking out how much time was left before the tests had to be handed in, more...

1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out of the reflecting pond. 2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big. 3. Dial 900 numbers from demonstration phones in Radio Shack. 4. Sneeze on the sample tray at Hickory Farms and helpfully volunteer to consume its now unwanted contents. 5. At the bottom of an escalator, scream 'MY SHOELACES! AAAGH!' 6. Ask the sales personnel at the music store whether inflated CD prices are in pesos or rubles. 7. Teach pet store parrots new vocabulary that makes them unsalable. 8. Stomp on ketchup packets at Burger King.. 9. ..but save a few to slurp on as snacks. Tell people that they're 'astronaut food'. 10. Follow patrons of B. Dalton's around while reading aloud from 'Dianetics.' 11. Ask mall cops for stories of World War I. 12. Ask a salesman why a particular TV is labeled black and white and insist that it's a color set. When he disagrees, give him a strange look and say, 'You mean you really can't more...

In the dead of summer a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. He was ahot, dry fly who said to no one in particular, "Gosh! If I go down threeinches I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed." There was a fish in the water thinking, "Gosh! If that fly goes down threeinches I can eat him." There was a bear on the shore thinking, "Gosh! If that fly goes down threeinches... that fish will jump for the fly... and I will eat him." It also happened that a hunter was further up the bank of the lake, preparing to eat a cheese sandwich. "Gosh!" he thought, "If that fly goesdown three inches... and that fish leaps for it... that bear will exposehimself and grab for the fish. I'll shoot the bear and then have a properlunch." You probably think this is enough activity for one bank of a lake, but Ican tell you there was more. A wee mouse by the hunter's foot was thinking, "Gosh! If that fly goes downthree inches... and more...

(I hope these aren't too offensive. Perhaps they should be encrypted?)
(1) A person belonging to an ethnic group whose members are commonly
considered to have certain stereotypical mannerisms met another
person belonging to a different ethnic group with a different set
of imputed stereotypical mannerisms. The first person acted in
a manner consistent with the stereotypes associated with his ethnic
group, and proceeded to make a remark which might be considered
to establish conclusively his membership in that group, whereupon his
companion proceeded to make a remark with a double meaning, the first
meaning of which could be interpreted to indicate his agreement with
his companion, but the other meaning of which serves to corroborate his
membership in his particular ethnic group. The first person took
offense at his remark, and reacted in a stereotypical way!
(2) Q: How many people belonging to a certain ethnic group does more...

1) A person belonging to an ethnic group whose members are commonly considered to have certain stereotypical mannerisms met another person belonging to a different ethnic group with a different set of imputed stereotypical mannerisms. The first person acted in a manner consistent
with the stereotypes associated with his ethnic group, and proceeded to make a remark which might be considered to establish conclusively his membership in that group, whereupon his companion proceeded to make a remark with a double meaning, the first meaning of which could be
interpreted to indicate his agreement with his companion, but the other meaning of which serves to corroborate his membership in his particular ethnic group. The first person took offense at his remark, and reacted in a stereotypical way!
(2) Q: How many people belonging to a certain ethnic group does it take to perform a particular menial activity?
A: A finite positive integer. One to perform the activity, and the rest more...