Payload Jokes / Recent Jokes
1. No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
2. There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
3. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump more...
1. No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.2. There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of3.5 children per household, that's91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.3. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the more...
As a result of an overwhelming lack of requests, and with research help from that renown scientific journal SPY magazine (January, 1990) - I am pleased to present the annual scientific inquiry into Santa Claus.
No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't
(appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the
workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an
average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One
presumes there's at least one good child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the
rotation of the earth, assuming more...
As a result of an overwhelming lack of requests, and with research help from that renowned scientific journal SPY magazine (January, 1990) - I am pleased to present the annual scientific inquiry into Santa Claus.
1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300, 000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
2) There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3. 5 children per household, that's 91. 8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the more...
1. Santa’s Workload
There are two billion children in the world, but since Santa doesn’t appear to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, and Budist children, that reduces his workload to 15% of the total, or 300 million. At an average rate of 3. 5 children per household, that’s 85. 7 million homes. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different times zones and the rotation of the Earth, assuming he travels East to West. This works out to 767. 9 visits per second. So for each household with good children, Santa has about 1/1, 000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the presents, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, into the sleigh and move on to the next house. ”
2. The Time/Distance Factor
Assuming that these 91. 8 million stops are evenly distributed around the Earth, we’re talking about. 78 miles per household, a total trip of 75. 5 million more...
No known species of reindeer can fly. But there are 300,000 species
of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects
and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer which only
Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But
since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist
children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according
to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per
household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good
child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time
zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which
seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that
for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a more...
Is There a Santa Claus? As a result of an overwhelming lack of requests, and with research help fromthat renown scientific journal SPY magazine (January, 1990) - I am pleased topresent the annual scientific inquiry into Santa Claus. 1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300, 000 species ofliving organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insectsand germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santahas ever seen. 2) There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish andBuddhist cihldren, that reduces the workload to to 15% of the total - 378million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census)rate of 3. 5 children per household, that's 91. 8 million homes. One presumesthere's at least one good child in each. 3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the differenttime zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he more...