Pressure Jokes / Recent Jokes
When a physician remarked on a new patient's extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, "High blood pressure, Doc. It comes from my family."
"Your mother's side or your father's?" I asked.
"Neither," he replied. "It's from my wife's family."
"Oh, come now," I said. "How could your wife's family give you high blood pressure?"
He sighed. "You oughta meet her mother sometime, Doc!"
When a physician remarked on a new patient's extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, "High blood pressure, Doc. It comes from my family.""Your mother's side or your father's?" I asked."Neither," he replied. "It's from my wife's family.""Oh, come now," I said. "How could your wife's family give you high blood pressure?"He sighed. "You oughta meet' em sometime, Doc!"
Editor's Note: It's dry parody. You gotta really like sci-fi to enjoy this one...
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Experiment 8 Postflight Summary
NASA publication 14-307-1792
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ABSTRACT
The purpose of this experiment was to prepare for the expected participation in long-term space based research by husband-wife teams once the US space station is in place. To this end, the investigators explored a number of possible approaches to continued marital relations in the zero-G orbital environment provided by the XXXXXX shuttle mission.
Our primary conclusion is that satisfactory marital relations are within the realm of possibility in zero-G, but that many couples would have difficulty getting used to the approaches we found to be most satisfactory.
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INTRODUCTION
The more...
On a flight on takeoff from Las Vegas: "Everyone look out the right windows and wave goodbye to your money one last time."
"There's a man up front today celebrating his 95th birthday. So, as you're leaving, please stop and say' Happy Birthday' to the captain."
"Welcome aboard today's flight to Phoenix. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."
"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two small children, decide now which one you love more."
"Smoking in the lavatories is prohibited. Any person caught more...
Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering
Department, University of Oklahoma, is known for posing questions on
final exams like: ''Why do airplanes fly?''
In May a few years ago, the ''Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer '' exam
paper contained the question:
''Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof.''
Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or
similar. One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate
are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think
we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that
exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you are not a
member of their more...
New scientific theories2nd RunnerUp- The' Why Yawning Is Contagious' Theory: You yawnto equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure changeoutside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures, sothey must yawn to even it all out.
"Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children."