Rabbit Jokes / Recent Jokes

Waiter, what is this hare doing in my salad? I believe hes eating your lettuce.

Here are some important management lessons that many of us have had to learn the hard way...
Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull.
"I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy.
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of more...

A horse & a little chicken were plying in a field. Suddenly the horse's
foot got stuck in a rabbit borrow,
The horse tried so hard to pull it's foot out, but he couldn't. So he asked for
little chicken's help but being only a little chicken he couldn't do much.
so, the horse said to the chicken "why don't you run home and get the master, he
will be able to pull me out," so the little chicken ran home to look for the
master. Unfortunately, the master was not home, The chicken did not know what to
do.
Chicken looked around and he didn't see any thing that he could use to pull the
horse out. All of a sudden he saw it."Master's Brand new sports car" The chicken
got on the car drove to the field, and tied horse's foot in to the car and
pulled him out. The horse was very grateful. and said I will help you out any
day, if you need my help.
The little chicken said that's very nice of you, and they went more...

Theres a rabit running through the jungle and he comes up to a giraffe smoking a spliff and says you dont wanna do that you wanna come out running with me get healthy after some hesitation the giraffe aggrees so there both running along and they come up to a snake doing lines of coke and the rabbit says you dont wanna do that shit you wanna come running get healthy so he says ye might as well so there all running allong and they come up to a lion doing smack and he turns to the lion and says you dont wanna be doing that shit you wanna come out running with all of us get healthy with this statement just put to him the lion just turns and beets up the rabbit the giraffe and snake are amazed that he just did it and they say to him why did you do that he says ive had enough of that cunt every time hes on pills he wants to go fucking running

A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the
barman "Can I have a pint of beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie"
The barman is amazed but gives the rabbit a
pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the
toastie, he then leaves.
The following night the rabbit returns and again asks for a Pint of Beer and
a Ham and Cheese Toastie.
The barman, now intrigued by the rabbit and the extra drinkers in the pub (because word gets round) gives the rabbit the pint and the toastie.
The rabbit consumes them and leaves.
The next night, the pub is packed, in walks the rabbit and says "A pint of
beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie, please barman"
The crowd is hushed as the barman gives the rabbit his pint and toastie and
then burst into applause as the rabbit wolfs them down.
The next night there is standing room only in the pub, coaches have been
laid on for the crowds of patrons more...

What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit? Bugs Bunny.

In an effort to determine the top crime fighting agency in the country, the president narrowed the field to three finalist, the CIA, the FBI, and the Chicago Police.
The three remaining contenders were given the task of catching a rabbit which was released into the forest.
The CIA went into the forest. They placed animal informants throughout. They questioned all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigation they concluded that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI went into the forest. After two weeks without a capture, they burned the forest killing everything in it, including the rabbit. They made no apologies. The rabbit deserved it.
The CPD went into the forest. They came out two hours later with a badly beaten bear.
The bear was yelling “Okay, Okay, I’m a rabbit, I’m a rabbit”.