Remains Jokes / Recent Jokes
Scientists have found the remains of 3 million year old girl. She was probably a bitch like my aunt, who's been around for about that long.
If they find my remains in 3 million years, it'll probably be my skeleton decaying over a large stack of porn.
1689 - Spanish-German explorer Santa Claus discovers the North Pole, and establishes a small base camp.
1691 - Because of harsh and meager living conditions, Claus' crew abandons him. 1692 - Claus is rescued by the Viking ship Hvorfor. He returns to Europe, bringing some items along with him from the North Pole. He finds he is able to sell them quite easily, making a small profit. 1703 - Claus saves up enough money to buy a small ship and crew, and returns to the North Pole. Upon arriving, he finds his base camp, half-buried but still intact. 1704 - Claus returns to Europe with a shipload of North Pole artifacts, and is successful in selling them. He makes enough profit to increase his crew, and buys building materials to expand his polar base.
1705 - Claus returns again to the North Pole, and builds quarters for him and his crew, and sets up the Polar Exports Company.
1716 - After six shiploads of exports, the European market is flooded with polar more...
Of all tales of the supernatural, this one is perhaps the best documented, the most disturbing and
the most difficult to explain. The Princess of Amen-Ra lived some 1, 500 years before Christ. When she
died, she was laid in an ornate wooden coffin and buried deep in a vault at Luxor, on the banks of
the Nile.
In the late 1890's, 4 rich young Englishmen visiting the excavations at Luxor were invited to buy and
exquisitely fashioned mummy case containing the remains of Princess Amen-Ra. They drew lots.
The man who paid several thousand pounds had the coffin taken to his hotel. A few hours later, he was
seen walking out towards the desert. He never returned.
The next day, one of the remaining 3 men was shot by an Egyptian servant accidentally. His arm was so
severely wounded it had to be amputated.
The 3rd man in the foursome found on his return home that the bank holding his entire savings had
failed. The 4th guy suffered a severe more...