Reporter Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man was on a bridge as a news reporter walked by. She was told that if she didn't cover another story in 2 hours, she'd be fired. All of a sudden, the man starts to count "1,2,.."
"Wait!" interrupts the reporter.
"What is it?"
"What are you trying to do?"
"I'm going to commit suicide."
"May I join you?"
"Certainly."
The two shout "1,2..."
They're interrupted by a man walking down the street.
"May I join you?" he asks.
"Sure."
"1,2..."
As soon as the two men said 3, they jumped off, but the clever reporter stayed behind.
"3,2,1, and cue!"
"Good evening, I am just arriving at the scene of a crime. Two men just jumped off of this bridge."

I found this inside a old business card from
Stateside Locker Club, San Diego, CA:
In a South American mining district Mrs. Brown presented her
husband with a 12 pound baby boy. Mr. Brown was so delighted that he
went to the News office and told that he had found a 12 pound nugget of
gold as good as any to be found in South America. The paper, naturally,
sent a reporter to get particulars. This is what happened:
Reporter-Does Mr. Brown live here?
Mrs.Brown- he does.
Reporter-Is he in?
Mrs.Brown-No he isn't.
Reporter-I understand he found a nugget of gold weighing 12 pounds.
Mrs.Brown-(Seeing the joke) Yes.
Reporter-Can you show me the exact location where it was found?
Mrs.Brown-I'm afraid Mr. Brown would object as it is private.
Reporter-Is the hole far from here?
Mrs.Brown-No, it is quite handy.
Reporter-Has Mr. Brown been working the claim long?
Mrs.Brown-Almost ten months.
Reporter-Was Mr. Brown the first more...

A U.S. Mint spokesperson announced the plans for a new fifty-cent piece that was being issued in the honor of two great American patriots. On one side of the coin would be Theodore Roosevelt, on the other, Nathan Hale. When questioned by a reporter why two people were going to appear on the same coin, the spokesperson replied, "These two men were selected to simplify life for a vast majority of Americans."
The reporter then asked, "Could you explain how this would simplify life for Americans?"
The official responded, "Certainly, I'd be happy to. Now, when they toss a coin, they can simply call Ted's or Hale's."

In a South American mining district Mrs. Brown presented her
husband with a 12 pound baby boy. Mr. Brown was so delighted
that he went to the News office and told that he had found a
12 pound nugget of gold as good as any to be found in South
America. The paper, naturally, sent a reporter to get
particulars. This is what happened:
Reporter: Does Mr. Brown live here?
Mrs. Brown: He does.
Reporter: Is he in?
Mrs. Brown: No he isn't.
Reporter: I understand he found a nugget of gold weighing 12 pounds.
Mrs. Brown: (Seeing the joke) Yes.
Reporter: Can you show me the exact location where it was found?
Mrs. Brown: I'm afraid Mr. Brown would object as it is private.
Reporter: Is the hole far from here?
Mrs. Brown: No, it is quite handy.
Reporter: Has Mr. Brown been working the claim long?
Mrs. Brown: Almost ten months.
Reporter: Was Mr. Brown the first to work it?
Mrs. Brown: He thought he more...

There was a reporter from the city stuck in a small mountainous town in W. Va. He decided to use the time by getting a good story to submit to his boss. He saw an old man sitting outside a local store and went over to begin the interview.

"Sir, I am writing a story about people in this area and would like to include an interesting story from you. Is there any particular story that you would like to share?"

The old hillbilly smiled to himself as he thought back on a time. "Well, thar was the time I lost my sheep. We gathered up a bunch of the boys, got some moonshine in us and went off after it. When we found the sheep, we all took turns screwing it.... my, that was fun!"

The reporter couldn't write a story about that so he asked for another.

"Well, when my neighbor's wife got lost, we all gathered up and got drunk and went out to look for her. We had a good time taking turns with her when we found her, too. Damn that more...

Reporter: My editor sent me to do the burglary. Policeman: Youre too late - its already been done.

Two boys are playing hockey on an inlet on a pond in suburban Chicago when one is attacker by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick and wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to the boy. "Young White Sox Fan Saves Friend from Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook."But I'm not a Sox fan," the little hero replied."Sorry, since we are in Chicago, I just assumed you were," said the reporter, and he began writing again."Cubs Fan Rescues Friends from Horrific Attack," he continued writing in his notebook."I'm not a Cubs fan either," the boy said."I assumed everyone in Chicago was either for the Cubs or the Sox. What team do you root for?" inquired the reporter. "I'm a Yankees fan," the child responded.The reporter turned the page in his notebook and wrote "Little Brat from New York more...