Romantic Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q. What does Bill say to Hillary after a romantic interlude?
A. Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes.
HOW TO SAY "I LOVE YOU" IN MANY LANGUAGES:
English........... I Love You
Spanish.......... Te Amo
French........... Je T'aime
German.......... Ich Liebe Dich
Japanese....... Ai Shite Imasu
Italian.......... Ti Amo
Chinese......... Wo Ai Ni
Swedish........ Jag Alskar Dig
Eskimo.......... Nagligivaget
Greek............ S'Agapo
Hawaiian....... Aloha Wau la Oe
Irish............. Thaim In Grabh Leat
Hebrew......... Ani Ohev Otakh
Russian........ Ya Lyublyu Tyebya
Albanian....... Une Te Dua
Finnish......... Mina Rakkastan Sinua
Turkish........ Seni Seviyorum
Hungarian...... Se Ret Lay
Persian....... Du Stet Daram
Maltese....... Jien Inhobbok
Catalan...... Testimo Molt
American.... Nice Tits
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary.
Their domestic tranquillity had long been the talk of the town.
A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret
of their long and happy marriage.
"Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man.
"We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom
on the canyon by pack mule.
We hadn't gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled.
My wife quietly said,' That's once.'
We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again.
Once more my wife quietly said,' That twice.'
We hadn't gone a half- mile when the mule stumbled the third time.
My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead.
I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me
and quietly said' That's once.'"
What is the most romantic city in England? Loverpool!
These two guys meet after not having seen each other for many many years. First guy asks the second guy " how have things been going? " The second guy speaking very s.. l.. o.. w.. l.. y.. tells the first guy " I w.. a.. s.. a.. l.. m.. o.. s.. t m.. a.. r.. r.. i.. e.. d. The first guy says in amazement "Hey! you don't stutter any more." The answer comes " y.. e.. s I w.. e.. n.. t t.. o a d.. o.. c.. t.. o.. r a.. n.. d h.. e t.. o.. l.. d m.. e t.. h.. a.. t i.. f I s.. p.. e.. a.. k.. s.. l.. o.. w.. l.. y I w.. i.. l.. l n.. o.. t s.. t.. u.. t.. t.. e.. r."
The first friend congratulates him and then asks again about the ex-stutterer saying he "was almost married". "W.. e.. l.. l m.. y f.. i.. a.. n.. c.. e.. e a.. n.. d I w.. e.. r.. e s.. i... t.. t.. i.. n.. g.. o.. n h.. e.. r p.. o... r.. c.. h a.. n.. d t.. h.. e d.. o.. g w.. a.. s s.. c.. r.. a.. t.. c.. h.. i.. n.. g h.. i.. s b.. a.. c.. k a.. n.. d I t.. o.. more...
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor
called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a
very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your
husband will surely die." "Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Try to be
pleasant in general, and make sure he stays in a good mood. For lunch make him a
nutritious meal. For dinner prepare something nice and healthy again. Don't burden him
with chores, as he probably had a hard day. Don't discuss your problems with him, it will
only make his stress worse. And most importantly, make love with your husband several
times a week and satisfy his every whim. "If you can do this for the next 1 to 2
months, I think your husband will regain his health completely. On the way home, the
husband asked his wife, "What did the doctor say?" "You're going more...