Shane Jokes / Recent Jokes
Shane Warne and Simone had been married for more than 10 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that Shane had a secret shoe box under the bed.
When they first got married Shane said,"I am putting a shoe box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it." In all their 10 years of marriage, Simone had never looked. However on the afternoon of their 10th anniversary curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer cans and $81, 874. 25 in cash. She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now that she knew what was in the box she was doubly curious why there even was such a box with such contents.
That evening they were out for a special anniversary dinner. After dinner Simone could no longer contain her curiosity and she confessed saying "I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked into the box more...
One Sunday, Shane walks into a church and kneels down at the altar and begins to pray to God, stating that he owes many people money and asks to win the lottery. After he is done praying, he gets up and walks out.
The next Sunday he goes to the same church and pleads with God through his prayers to let him win the lottery so that he can pay these people back.
The next Sunday comes around and Shane enters the church very upset and close to tears, he kneels at the alter and asks why God is doing this to him and say's that he has asked to win the lottery for three weeks now and nothing. Suddenly there came a loud bang of thunder and God spoke, "Shane, meet me halfway: Buy a damn ticket!"
One Sunday, Shane walks into a church and kneels down at the altar and begins to pray to God, stating that he owes many people money and asks to win the lottery. After he is done praying, he gets up and walks out.The next Sunday he goes to the same church and pleads with God through his prayers to let him win the lottery so that he can pay these people back.The next Sunday comes around and Shane enters the church very upset and close to tears, he kneels at the alter and asks why God is doing this to him and say's that he has asked to win the lottery for three weeks now and nothing. Suddenly there came a loud bang of thunder and God spoke, "Shane, meet me halfway: Buy a damn ticket!"
Shane invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful Shane's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between Shane and his roommate and this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Shane and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Shane volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Kerry and I are just rommates."
About a week later, Kerry came to Shane and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle."
"You don't suppose she took it, do you? " Shane said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a email just to be sure."
So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you did take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you didn't take a more...
A recent poll encourages Shane Mosley to retire on top, after his destructive victory over Antonio Margarito. For non-boxing fans, "retire" is an industry term for "wait until I'm bored, and demand more money."