Shower Jokes / Recent Jokes
there was a little kid and she wanted to take a shower with her mom and her mom said es when they were in the shower the little girl looked up and said "
mommy whats that?"
and her mom said "
thats my garden"
the next day the little girl wanted to take a shower with her dad and he said ok when they were in the shower the littlegirl looked up and asked "
daddy whats that?"
and her dad said "
thats my snake"
that night she got scared and slept with her mom and dad during the night she woke up and said "
MOMMY, MOMMY! THE SNAKES GOING IN THE GARDEN!!!
Top 10 Reasons No One Wants to go into Space with John Glenn again:
10. The horror of seeing the effects of G-Forces on wrinkles.
9. Kept using the Hubble to find his glasses.
8. Everytime he sneezed, his teeth flew out.
7. Forgot where he was each morning, kept grabbing for Scott while calling
him "Annie".
6. Constantly complaining about being "Stiff all over" while eyeing
Chiaki.
5. Couldn't get him to stop doing the "Viagra" experiment.
4. When warned, "There's a Meteor Shower ahead", he thought they said,
"Shower cause he'd peed the bed".
3. Couldn't seem to ever attach his urinal bag properly.
2. There's a real good reason why we call old men "Old Farts".
1. The Prunetang worked, but the Depends didn't.
Top 10 Reasons No One Wants to go into Space with John Glenn again:10. The horror of seeing the effects of G-Forces on wrinkles.9. Kept using the Hubble to find his glasses.8. Everytime he sneezed, his teeth flew out.7. Forgot where he was each morning, kept grabbing for Scott while callinghim "Annie".6. Constantly complaining about being "Stiff all over" while eyeingChiaki.5. Couldn't get him to stop doing the "Viagra" experiment.4. When warned, "There's a Meteor Shower ahead", he thought they said,"Shower cause he'd peed the bed".3. Couldn't seem to ever attach his urinal bag properly.2. There's a real good reason why we call old men "Old Farts".1. The Prunetang worked, but the Depends didn't.
We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top
this one:
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying. On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head.
The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem. Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb,
call out to me from the kitchen.
"Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it." "You know where the button is," I protested through the shower pitter-patter more...
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my illness, I always sense my boss thinks I am lying. On one occasion, I had a valid reason, but lied anyway because the truth was too humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on my crown.
The accident occurred mainly because I conceded to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially the new acquisition was no problem, but one morning I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. "Ed! The garbage disposal is dead. Come reset it." "You know where the button is." I protested through the shower (pitter-patter). "Reset it yourself!" "I am scared!" She pleaded. "What if it starts going and sucks me in?" (Pause) "C'mon, it'll only take a more...
A nun in the convent walked into the bathroom where mother superior was taking a shower. "There is a blind man to see you," she says. "Well, if he is a blind man, than it does not matter if I'm in the shower. Send him in."
The blind man walks into the bathroom, and mother superior starts to tell him how much she appreciates him working at the convent for them. She goes on and on and 10 minutes later the man interrupts: "That's nice and all, ma'am, but you can put your clothes on now. Where do you want me to put these blinds?