Silent Jokes / Recent Jokes
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have this
problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much because
they never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've
farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office."
The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next
week."
The next week the lady goes back to his office. "Doctor," she says, "I
don't know what you gave me, but now my farts, although still silent,
stink terribly!"
The doctor says, "Good, Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's
work on your hearing."
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week."The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts - although still silent - stink terribly."The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing...."
There was once a very prim and proper older lady who had a problem with passing gas. Since she came from a generation when people didn't even talk about this kind of problem it took a long time for her to seek help. Finally, however, she was persuaded to consult her family doctor.
After she filled out all the proper forms and had waited about 20 minutes in the waiting room the doctor called her into his office, leaned back in his chair, folded his hands into a steeple and asked her how he could help.
"Doctor," she said, "I have a very bad gas problem."
"A gas problem?" replied the doctor.
"Yes. Yesterday afternoon, I had lunch with the Secretary of State and his wife and had six, um, er, ahhh... silent gas emissions. Last night, I had dinner with the governor and his wife and had (BLUSH) four silent gas emissions. Then, while sitting in your waiting room I had five silent gas emissions! Doctor, you've got to help me! What can we more...
An elderly woman goes to the doctor. She says, "Doc, it's terrible, I pass gas all the time. Fortunately, it's odorless and silent, otherwise I'd be mortified. For example, I've passed gas ten times just since we've been talking, but it's odorless and silent so you can't tell." The doctor gives her some green pills and tells her to take one a day and come back in a week.
The woman comes back after taking the pills for a week. She says, "Doc, there's been a change but not for the better. I still pass gas all the time, but while it's still silent, now it smells terrible!"
The doctor says, "Well, I'm glad we cleared up your sinus blockage,now we'll have to work on your hearing."
Once morron and banta when they were kids were travelling when they got into the plane they started cheering "boeing boeing". Their teacher asked them to' be silent'. they both started saying oeing "oeing" be silent (b silent).
A little old Asian lady goes to the doctor in China, and says, "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't bother me too much... my farts never smell, and they're always quiet. But I've been doing it very often." The doctor asks her to explain more, and the old lady says, "In fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You probably didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and they're silent." The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week. "The next week the lady comes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my farts... although still silent... stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."
Lost All Sense
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An elderly lady complains to the M. D. that she passes gas
many times a day.
"It's really more of a nuisance than a problem", she explains,
"they're silent and they don't smell."
The M. D. gives her a prescription and tells her to come back
in a week.
She returns and says,"I don't know what it was you gave me,
doc, but I still pass gas all the time, it is still silent, but it
smells terribly!"
The M. D. replies, "Now that we've cleared up your sinuses,
we'll see what we can do for your hearing."