Sin Jokes / Recent Jokes

Question: Whats the difference between sin and shame? Answer: It is a sin to put it in, but its a shame to pull it out.

A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: ‘Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret? ’ ‘Yes, ’ the professor ansvered. ‘When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was off-side. But the referee did not se it so, and the goal won us the match. I regret that now. ’ ‘Well, ’ said the gatekeeper. ‘That is a very minor sin. You may enter. ’ ‘Thank you very much, Saint Peter, ’ the professor ansvered. ‘Im am not Saint Peter, ’ said the gatekeeper. ‘He is having his lunchbreak. I am Saint Lucas. ’

Q: What's the difference between sin and shame?
A: It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."

The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up.

The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."

Beer and the quotes it has helped create over the years... I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in themorning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. - -Frank SinatraThe problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober. - -William Butler YeatsAn intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. - -Ernest HemingwayAlways do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. - -Ernest HemingwayYou're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. - -Dean MartinDrunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it. - -AnonymousNo animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as drink. - -G. K. ChestertonTime is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. - -Catherine ZandonellaAbstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. - -Ambrose BierceReality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol. - more...

The Irish girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned." "What is it, child?" The girl said, "Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am." The priest turned, took a good look at the girl, and said, "My dear, I have good news. That isn't a sin - it's only a mistake."

In the town square a nasty crowd had gathered, intending to stone to death a prostitute. From the crowd, Jesus strides forward, holds up his arms and yells "Let ye without sin cast the first stone!"
The crowd is contrite, for none amongst them can honestly say they are without sin. Then a little old, withered up woman comes hobbling up, picks up a good size rock and beans the prostitute right between the eyes.
Jesus just stands there with his hands on his hips and says, "Sometimes, Mother, you really piss me off!"