Spreadsheet Jokes / Recent Jokes

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist and the fourth man was a Government Employee.
To show off, the Engineer called his cat,
"T-square, do your stuff."
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
But the Accountant said his cat could do better.
He called his cat and said,
"Spreadsheet, do your stuff."
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. ........... Everyone agreed that was good.
But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said
"Measure, do your stuff."
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 more...

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs were. The first man was an Engineer, the second an Accountant, the third man a Chemist, and the fourth a Government worker.

To show off, the Engineer called to his dog,' T-Square, do your stuff!' T-Square trotted over to the desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that T-Square was pretty smart!

Then the Accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said,' Spreadsheet, show them how smart you are!' Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen, and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each. Everyone agreed, that was good!

Yet the Chemist said his dog could do even better. He called his dog and said,' Measure, do your thing!' Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10-ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop. more...