Stockbrokers Jokes

How many stockbrokers does it take to change a light bulb?

"My God! It burnt out!! Sell all my G. E. stock NOW!!!"

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).

Two stockbrokers went to lunch. One looked at the other and said, "Let's relax while we eat and talk about something other than the market or any kind of business at all."
"Good idea Sam. Let's talk about women."
"OK - common or preferred?"

Version 1:
How many stockbrokers does it take to change a light bulb?
"My God! It burnt out!! Sell all my G. E. stock NOW!!!"
Version 2:
How many stockbrokers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two all up. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).

A long time ago, a visitor from out of town came to a tour in Manhattan. At the end of the tour they took him to the financial district. When they arrived to Battery Park the guide showed him some nice yachts anchoring there, and said, "Here are the yachts of our bankers and stockbrokers." "And where are the yachts of the investors?" asked the naive visitor.