Strangers Jokes

The Public Enemy
“I`m not accustomed to riding with strangers,” Gwen. "We`re not gonna be strangers," Tom in “Public Enemy” with Jean Harlow and James Cagney. Warner Bros. 1931, directed by William Wellman.

1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They may appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some things you need to know: a. Don't pee on the tree b. Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree c. Mind your tail when you are near the tree d. If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open e. Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the wall to the more...

A pair of inebriated strangers struck up a friendly conversation at a bar and the subject soon got around to sex, as it usually does.
"Say," said the first fellow, smirking, "have you ever been so drunk that you kissed a woman on the navel?"
With a mighty effort, the second sot propped himself up and said, "Drunker."

The Most Complete List Of Ways To Annoy People, Cops, Your Roommate, And More.

Annoy People

1. Pay tolls with $100 bills

2. Leave your supermarket cart on the street or in the middle of the parking lot

3. Eat produce at the market; don't buy it

4. When giving directions, leave out a turn or two

5. Leave the outdoor Christmas decorations up until March or April

6. Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons

7. Knock and ask "How is it going?" to someone constipated in a public bathroom stall.

8. Develop at least three strategies for cutting into the front of lines

9. Announce when you're going to the bathroom

10. Chew other people's pencils

11. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

12. Wear large hats during the movies

13. Touch strangers

14. Tell little children the truth about Santa more...

1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They may appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.
2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.
3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.
4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some things you need to know:
a. Don't pee on the tree
b. Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree
c. Mind your tail when you are near the tree
d. If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open
e. Don't chew on the cord that runs from the more...