Structured Jokes / Recent Jokes

Structured Programming supports the law of the excluded middle.

Real Programmers don't eat quiche. They like Twinkies, Coke and palate scorching Szechwan food.
Real Programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand and harder to modify.
Real Programmers don't document. Documentation is for simpletons who can't read listings or the object code from the dump.
Real Programmers scorn Floating Point Arithmetic. The decimal point was invented for pansy bedwetters who are unable to "think big."
Real Programmers' programs never work right the first time. But if you throw them on the machine they can be patched into working order in "only a few" 30-hour debugging sessions.
Real Programmers don't read manuals. Reliance on a reference is the hallmark of the novice and the coward.
Real Programmers don't write application programs. They program right down on the bare metal. Application programming is for the dullards who can't do systems programming.
Real Programmers more...

Part 3 - (Structured Programming)
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The academics in computer science have gotten into the' structured programming' rut over the past several
years. They claim that programs are more easily understood if the programmer uses some special language
constructs and techniques. They don't all agree on exactly which constructs, of course, and the examples
they use to show their particular point of view invariably fit on a single page of some obscure journal or the
other - clearly not enough of an example to convince anyone. When I got out of school, I thought I was the
best programmer in the world. I could write an unbeatable tic-tac-toe program, use five different
programming languages, and create 1000-line programs that WORKED. (Really!) Then I got out into the Real
World. My first assignment in the Real World was to read and understand a 200, 000-line FORTRAN program,
then speed it up by a factor of two. Any more...