Surf Jokes / Recent Jokes
Does your dog know how how to surf the internet? No - but he's got a ruff idea.
Why couldn't the baby camel surf the Internet? Because whenever his parents saw their phone bill they got the hump.
Why was Cinderella able to surf the web? Because he footman turned into a mouse.
How do heavy metal bands surf the web? On the Din-ternet.
Every day the same old thing
Essays, reading, handwriting
I do it all while sitting here
With a very tempting computer near.
I try to ignore the silent plea
"Please, surf the net on me"
I, for a while I ignore the call
By writing a paper on the Taj Mahal.
But inevitably
It gets to me
I shove my work out of the way
(Don't worry I'll do it another day).
The screen savers gone when I click on the mouse
A happy blue glow fills up the house
I open the Internet, "Whoopitydee"
I yell (there are 5 new emails for me).
When I've replied I surf the net
Is there anything exciting? You bet!
I'll do this while the sun fades away
Marking the end of another long day
But I will not notice, oh no not me
I'll be too wrapped up in my computer you see.
Why Dogs don't surf the web...
Can't stick their heads out of Windows 2000.
Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.
Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."
Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.
Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.
Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.
Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...
Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.
SmellU-SmellMe still in beta test.
SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question!
Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to manouever.
Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.masters.leg.
Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.
Why Dogs don't surf the web...Can't stick their heads out of Windows 2000.Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.SmellU-SmellMe still in beta test.SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question! Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to manouever.Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.masters.leg.Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.